June 13, 2003
(A spoiler a day, keeps the questions at bay.)
Do you believe in the good
old days? Not a sentimental type, I don’t put much stock in good old
days. Good memories should be savored and bad memories made peace with.
Both kinds exist in whatever time of life in which I happen to be
traveling. I’m sharing that piece of personal philosophy so when you read
the following you’ll know that I am not necessarily criticizing (maybe a
tad in a couple places) what I see on GH today, just appreciating what I
liked a few years ago. This week I had one of those ready for bed, want
to sleep but can’t, nights. So, I slipped an old GH tape in the VCR and
let it roll. Some like ocean waves or sounds of rain; I relax with old GH
tapes. Characters I know following insane but predictably soapy paths,
speaking in familiar tones soon lull me into a relaxed state. It’s like
reminiscing with a close friend. Aaaah, remember when?
Jason wore slacks and shirts
Katherine Bell and Lucy Coe
argued over the Nurse’s Ball?
Mike had a place in Sonny’s
life that included conversations and arguments?
Emily and Jason visited and
Chloe designed gowns and
laughed at the Q’s antics?
Bobbi had a storyline with
Luke and Felicia were friends
Mac and Taggert conducted
themselves like police officers. They didn’t solve crimes but they acted
like they were going to at any moment.
Ned smiled, adored Alexis and
flashed his dimples looking like he was having fun?
V? I so enjoyed her not
glamorous, not sex crazed personality.
Laura made us hurt with her
palpable grief over losing realLucky?
Leslie Lu existed as an
Carly was always
workin’ a plan?
Johnny guarded Sonny’s door
on a regular basis?
Older pics courtesy of the GH Historical Society
Emily was changing from girl
Jason had conversations with
people other than Sonny and Courtney?
Luke was sad but rational?
Sonny and Carly clashed
because they couldn’t stand each other?
Wow! And that was only one
hour of one tape. Oh yeah, I remember what hooked me on General
Hospital. Do you? I’d like to make a Remember When list for next
week of GH memories that still make you sigh and smile when you pause to
wave at nostalgia. Since many of you smart people latched onto the GH
bandwagon before I did, you can remember great moments, characters or plot
events that I haven’t seen. C’mon, tell me what’s floatin’ around in your
happy memory boat.
Tuesday was GH Go To Bed
Day. Carly awoke in her hospital bed to find psycho Ric gazing at her.
Sleeping with Emily, Nik opened his eyes to look around the room sensing
Lydia’s eyes upon him. Emily woke up to throw up and then climbed back in
bed with Nik for comfort. She awoke in the morning with a perfect coat of
lip gloss and I want to know how that’s done because I can’t seem to
master the all night lip gloss trick. Luke finally went comatose which
was a relief considering the games he was playing with that big knife. An
odd Tuesday, as characters spoke their lines horizontally and no sex
Hugs, cuddles and restraints, no kisses
Pinball anyone? That would
be Luke bumping and careening his way about town weaving and threatening
others with a 12-inch knife. Bump! Luke first kissed and then threatened
Summer and Lucky before declaring his ability to take care of Laura and
leaving the room. Lucky, ever the dutiful, loving son, rushed to Summer
for kisses and hugs and I’m yelling, “Hello? Lucky? Your Dad just left
Kelly’s wielding a big knife. Don’t you think you should go after him?”
Lucky must’ve heard me because finally the thought occurred to him
that perhaps he should find his Dad. Bam! Luke called Dr. Cam from his
office to share drinks and request Dr. Cam’s medical pull to help him find
Laura. Luke has good reason to suspect Stefan of foul play from
experience. He told Cameron, “If you don’t know him (Stefan) just picture
Dracula crossed with a rodent.” Too funny! When Dr. Cam wouldn’t
cooperate, (when has he ever) Luke pulled out his knife again and held it
to Dr. Cam’s throat. Luckily, Luke found a pinch of sense and went out
the door collapsing in a heap of unconscious crazy man. Here’s the
dilemma. Luke’s a guy who skips to his own drummer even when the drummer
doesn’t play by the rules. He’s a free spirit with an attitude. Cameron
and Lucky can understand Luke, even admire him, but they can’t responsibly
let him loose in society. And since Anthony Geary’s vacation is looming,
Luke’s life will spiral into more craziness until he exits.
Luke could act with chipsticks, but he does really
well with a knife.
“Hip, Hip, Hooray,
It’s great to be gay.”
Watch out! Dobson came out
of the closet and Edward didn’t even catch it. A lot passed by Edward
such as a huge carpetbag containing Alexis’ attorney clothes stashed
behind a plant at the P.C. Grill and the fact that Dobson can’t hold his
liquor. At least Dobson/Alexis was able to address Judge Farmer’s
impropriety in calling Skye (huh?) to set a meeting regarding Kristina’s
custody. Can we say pay off? Bribe? Campaign contribution? Each time I
see Edward gloating and plotting regarding Kristina, I feel anticipation.
Someday Edward you’re due for an ugly comeuppance when you get smacked
with the knowledge you’re doting on a Cassadine/Corinthos offspring and
not a Cassadine/Q heir. Oh, what a delicious day that will be!
Thank you Mac for noticing
the charge on your credit card for a room at the Port Charles Hotel. Not
that Georgie faced any dire consequences or even had to answer Mac’s
questions, but at least the subject was aired. They were interrupted by
Dillon’s arrest for using A.J.’s Hummer to uproot parking meters.
Georgie ducks Mac’s questions while Dillon makes a
The thought of A.J. in a
Hummer cracks me up - a guy with pyro and power issues driving around in a
tough car. I keep battery cables, an extra quart of oil and some water in
the back of my car. What do you suppose A.J. keeps in his? (Now
that’s a poll question if I ever heard one.)
Georgie is one hardheaded,
one-track chick. If a boy tells you twice, nicely, that he only wants to
be friends and that he feels more for your sister, don’t you think the
message should sink in? Nope, Georgie thinks she has a chance with Lucas
and blames the prom fiasco on Dillon. He ruined her night by forcing her
to witness Lucas and Maxie kissing. Of course, Lucas took no
responsibility for the kiss. He told Georgie, “I came in looking for that
party you told me about. Maxie was there.” “Oh, and then your lips just
got vacuum sucked to her face, is that it?” Georgie asked, showing one
second of sense before reverting to heartbroken hard head. Lucas said, “I
was there to be with you. But Maxie mauled me when I got upstairs.” That
must’ve happened on another episode because the show I saw didn’t include
any mauling. More like mutually consenting suck face.
Lucas patronizes Georgie, while Dillon offers to
Maxie attempts to explain to Georgie about boys and
Why was Courtney going to hop
on a plane and fly to London? I didn’t see any splint indicating that her
index finger was broken and she couldn’t pick up the telephone and
When Jason’s arrested he’s
always yanking and fighting against the handcuffs. One time, I’d like to
see him unlock the cuffs with a paperclip or a lock kit hidden in his belt
buckle. He could stand or sit there like nothing’s different and flummox
the cops when they inevitably have to release him for the usual lack of
evidence. As he walks out, they could realize the cuffs weren’t even
Mac explained to Scotty that the bad guys are badder
than the DA.
Scotty tells Jason, “I’m gonna get you.” Jason
says, “I doubt it, Bud. You’re leaving for the vamp side of Port Charles
Didn’t you love Scotty’s
frustration at being bested in his own arena? He was preening and patting
himself on the back for bagging Sonny’s golden goon when the drugs
disappeared from the evidence room. Ya gotta love the MOB style slap in
the face of a power show under the noses of the PCPD.
Where were the freaked out
just-saw-a-ghost reactions to Alcazar? I wanted screaming, jumping,
backing up to a wall, but I didn’t see any of that. He’s walking around
and the only ones who showed any reaction (and they were in the
background) were Mac and the police officers standing near him when
Alcazar walked into the PCPD. Sigh. What a missed opportunity for
At least Mac and his officers remembered this guy
I am pretty sure that the
poster advertising Liz’s upcoming art show was her “Painting the Wind”
picture that she painted during her freedom days with Jason.
How do you suppose Ric and Liz paint the wind?
It bites when you drug your
wife, leave to kidnap a woman so you can hold her hostage until her baby
is born and another icy, evil character shows up and stages a rescue of
your wife so you’ll owe him and messes up your plan. It’s tough in the
life of the mentally deranged. Definitely, it’s frightening and creepy (I
can think of several adjectives). Carly came out of her drugged haze to
find herself trapped in Ric’s evil gaze. I’ve only felt powerless and
lack of autonomy a few times and they are terrible feelings. I found
myself clutching my elbows and holding my breath at Carly’s appropriate
terror. In her mind, Ric is her rapist so it’s not like she can think,
“Oh well, this is Sonny’s brother going off the deep end again.” Next
week, I know I’ll be rooting for Carly to take the upper hand. I read in
ABC Soaps In Depth this week that Maurice Benard commented on Ric’s
behavior saying, “He needs an a** whippin’.” I totally agree. Bring it
on Sonny, the whuppin’ and some commitment papers; cause brother or not,
Ric’s a head case and a half.
Mobster helps bad guy’s wife. Bad guy steals other
mobster’s wife. Got it?
Faith must be out of town.
Otherwise, Ric never could have pulled off Carly’s church snatch because
she’d have seen events unfold from her place behind a bush. Bet she’s
gonna be mad that she missed all the action. Wouldn’t it be cool if
Faith’s obsession switched to Alcazar? She could chase him like a hungry
tiger and he could respond with controlled passion, which would drive her
crazy. Money and power rolled up in a handsome package, which is probably
like whip cream and a cherry on top of her sundae for Faith. A GHH2
spoiler clues us that Ric sets up Faith to be arrested for attempted
murder (her favorite crime) but I’m thinkin’ orange jumpsuit isn’t her
best color so jail won’t last long.
Already, I am feeling sorry
for Elizabeth. She has issues with people leaving her or treating her
like she’s unimportant. Lucky left physically, came back, and then
emotionally dumped her by sleeping with her sister. Her family left her a
long time ago. Jason didn’t leave; he just didn’t share any big MOB
secrets. Liz asked Ric, “Promise me you’re telling the truth.” Umm,
Liz? If he’s lying to you already, the promise isn’t going to make a
difference. It appears inevitable that Ric’s gonna go too. Like in a
straight jacket maybe as his mental instability becomes apparent. I’m
really curious to see if she’ll stand by Ric because she’s important to
him and he needs her, or will scruples override her feelings because of
the hideous crimes Ric commits?
“Promise you’re telling the truth, Ric. Cross your
heart and hope to die?”
I promise, I’m telling the truth, Liz. Stick a
needle in my eye.”
Alcazar called Liz to leave
an ominous message for Ric. Quick acting Liz immediately grabbed her
purse and ran out to find her errant husband. And because they
communicate through ESP or radar, or antennae she knew to go straight to
Carly’s hospital room. Or perhaps Liz stepped out onto her front porch,
heard Carly’s screeching and followed the noise to Carly’s room in General
Hospital. Either way, Liz arrived before any of the hospital staff could
respond to a hysterical pregnant woman yelling at the top of her lungs.
Carly makes a scary face that frightens Liz and Ric
out of her room.
Who’da thought that Carly
would be a good mom? I like the dynamics between Carly and Michael. Not
that she’s perfect, she tends to forget he exists whenever Sonny has a
problem or an owie, but I like her in mom mode. Michael dropped
Courtney’s ring and Carly dropped down to the floor and crawled around in
her purple gown to help him look. “Thanks for not getting mad,” Michael
said. “We lose things, we find things. Life goes on.” Carly answered
like a good mom, ominously predicting her immediate future.
Good Dynamics vs. Bad Vibes
Bad Vibes win the first round.
Wasn’t the scene between
Sonny and Courtney in the church nice? I think that’s the first time
they’ve said I love you to each other. I also liked that all the proper
players attended including Mike, Janine, the Q’s (without A.J.), and
Emily. I’d like to write a gushing paragraph about the almost nuptials,
but the wedding came across as background music for Ric’s insane
Sonny-owes-me-a-baby plan. Jason made my toes curl in his tux and
Courtney looked beautiful in her designer wedding dress. Way too much
happy floating around for an actual wedding, which is why Ric had to sneak
in and jinx the event by traumatizing Michael and kidnapping Carly.
Everybody say, “Aaaaah.”
Now everybody say, “Oooooh.”
How much happy can we stand?
Sonny scolds Janine for showing up in such an ugly
Janine protests, “But Sonny, this is a one day gig,
and wardrobe made me wear it.”
Mike looks her up and down and says, “Really bad
The pull between Emily and
Nicholas is growing on me. I’d be tempted to root for them except, darn
it!, I want Emily and Zander to reunite and experience a few days of
bliss. All I am asking for is a week or so before the next murder charge,
beating, bus accident or medical crisis.
I tried to pay attention to the scene but I kept
Because Nik’s clothes were color coordinated with
the walls, furniture and bedspread.
Spoilers say that Stefan is
so threatened by Emily and Nicholas’ engagement that he plans a redux of
the fiancé-falls-from-the-parapet-at-her-engagement-party plot twist. I
have to wonder what the writers are thinking. If they were laughing
saying, “Oh we have to loosen a railing. It’s Stefan after all.” I’ll fly
with the storyline. But if it’s presented like a grand idea that they
just made up for the third time, I’m going to make fun of them
every week until they raise their storytelling standards.
One spoiler tells, “The long
anticipated kiss between Gia and Zander happens.” Are a lot of you
holding your breath for this kiss? ‘Cause I’ve been focused on Zander,
Emily and Nicholas and kissing between Gia and Zander hasn’t received a
fleeting consideration in my thought processes.
Gia checks out Zander’s lips, considering the
And finally, a GHH2 spoiler
says that Ric becomes “so fed up with Carly’s resistance, he decides to
just drop her off at her Doctor to be rid of her.” Are you laughing too?
Carly’s mouth and fighting attitude so stresses Ric that he’s willing to
dump her and his plan to steal her baby just to be rid of her. Not that
it’ll happen that way with Alcazar lurking about, but the premise sounds
good. One spoiler also says that Ric convinces Liz that she’s hearing
things. Is Carly yelling so loudly that she can be heard through the
sound proof walls of the panic room?
Photos by Jim Warren
GH – Home of Hunks of all ages.
I know there are a few missing but I had to take
what was available.
A couple months ago, I ran
out of tolerance with J.C. Penney. One day I counted from the last
segment of OLTL through GH and J.C. Penney aired their “Where is your
Mother?” commercial six times. SIX TIMES! By the sixth time I wanted to
reach into my screen, snatch the spoon away from the temper tantrum kid
and whack his Dad over the head, who sits there with a disgusted, can’t be
bothered look on his face. Hard! “Where is yoourrrr, Mother?” “She’s at
the J.C. Penney One Day Only Sale,” replies a cheerful voice. Out of
stubbornness, I would not shop a One Day Only Sale because they abusively
ram the weekly sale down my throat. And I told them so when I e-mailed to
complain about the number of times we were being forced to endure the same
couple of commercials within an hour’s time. The J.C. Penney Customer
Brush Off Department e-mailed an answer apologizing for the offensive
content of the commercial. I promptly replied suggesting they GET A CLUE,
it wasn’t the content of the commercial, it was the number of times they
were shoving it in my face. Shortly after my finger stomping (foot
stomping, while satisfying, is ineffective through e-mail) I read a ‘net
rumor that said J.C. Penney was pulling its ads from GH. I figured it was
my fault because of my e-mail and if GH lost sponsorship by J.C. Penney
other sponsors would follow, and I’d lose my show (I know, rampant
egomania). However, like a good little egomaniac, I kept my fingers to
myself and J.C.P. continued to advertise using different ads. But
finally, like a bear testing the temperature coming out of hibernation,
“Where is your Mother” showed up again. Whoever made that commercial
thinks it’s the zip in zippity do da.
Well, the gloves are off.
Last week being PMS week, I felt a need to let my fingers go stomp again.
First on my list was Herbal Essence Shampoo. If I was standing in line at
Wal-Mart and the lady in front of me was buying that shampoo, I’d be
wondering if she’s going home to shower, shampoo and orgasm. Next in line
was Colgate Herbal Toothpaste, which advertises using buzz words like
“herbal” and “natural”, a cartoon beaver, and a dumb woman talking to Mr.
Beaver. I’m shakin’ my head. What marketing genius made that up and who
at Colgate reviewed the concept and said, “Hmm, toothpaste, woman hiker a
few granola bars short of a full backpack and a cartoon beaver. Yeah,
let’s run with that.” The last e-mail went to Oil of Olay for their Total
Effects skin care products. Great stuff but I was full of sour grapes
since one little tube costs more than my monthly water bill. I’ll admit
to a healthy dose of vanity, so it would be nice to use this product. But
if I bought the daily cream, night cream and wrinkle reducer, I’d be
beautiful, wrinkle free and living out of my car. Ain’t gonna happen.
Both Colgate and Clairol sent a response from a real person, which I
appreciated. Oil of Olay hasn’t offered the time of day, perhaps deeming
me beneath their lofty notice since I complained about their pricyness.
I don’t want GH to lose
sponsorship but advertisers have a responsibility to entertain and/or
inform and not patronize and/or annoy. At the very least, I should not
feel an urge to make myself throw up. I’ve worked out my advertising
angst for the month, but I plan to keep it mind as therapy should I need
to vent. Have a great week and feel free to talk back to your TV screen.
I won’t tell.
Now isn’t THAT a scary thought.
Photo credit for this week:
I love this GH site!
A zebra’s gotta do what a zebra’s gotta do to make
it through life.
This pic was e-mailed to me so I have no photo
I will happily post a credit if I learn to whom the