Comments through September 27, 2002
(Little spoilers)

I have to begin with “The Wedding” of Jax and Skye.  It was both beautiful and hilarious.  Church looked wonderful.  The bride glowed in her wedding gown.  I loved the vows because I’m a sucker for the mushy and sentimental when sincerely presented.  Not too many guests in the wedding party – Mommy and Daddy Jacks, Ned and Alexis, Courtney and AJ for a few moments.  Notably absent and unmentioned were Jerry and Lila.  My favorite part occurred as Jax and Skye made their vows and Brenda watched, listened and cried remembering her special moments with Jax. 

Now let’s list the uninvited guests running back and forth, in and out, and all conversing at times – Alcazar with gun of course, Brenda of course, Jason with gun of course, Roy packing heat, Felicia (let’s hope no one gives this woman a weapon), and Max probably with gun in tow.  Four guns running about while the wedding proceeded.  I noticed that only Alcazar’s gun had a silencer which he needed since by my count three shots were fired – one thwarted by Brenda, one at Jason, and one at himself with Roy’s assistance.  All of this while the wedding party remained oblivious.  Yep, I laughed as they played freeze tag room to room, hopping over furniture, hiding in alcoves, bumping into each other and accomplishing nothing.  An imagination sticker goes to the writers for wounding Alcazar instead of Jason for a change.  Perhaps it’s enough that not so dead Sonny supposedly took five bullets last week.  That’s probably the good guy MOB bullet limit for a couple episodes. 

Was that more foreshadowing when Papa Jacks told Ned and expecting Alexis that he’s hoping to hear the patter of little feet soon?  Don’t tell Jax.  Is that a sign of events to unfold because it would be way too easy for Ned and Alexis to birth that baby without some twisty drama?  Maybe it’s Ned’s turn to fake die.  Jax could step in and say he’ll be father to Sonny’s little girl, thereby thwarting both Skye and Brenda for a bit.  C’mon, Jax and Skye can’t last with Brenda back.  She’s going to hook up with Sonny or Jax and Sonny’s death act will really piss her off so I’m betting Jax.  Besides, that’s what the rumors say and I believe everything Sage tells me. LOL 

The priests in PC sure are good looking! 

I liked how Maxie explained to Felicia about her failings as a parent during the last year or so.  She expressed what I’ve been thinking but haven’t quite formulated into words.  So Maxie shared her honest teenage angst with her mom who nodded understandingly then glanced at the PC Herald, which sported a front page announcement of Jax and Skye’s wedding.  Felicia, being such a caring and attentive parent, promptly shoved Maxie and Georgie off on Mac, ran home to change into her dressy Danger Mom On A Mission clothes and hurried to St. Timothy’s to search for Roy, who was searching for Alcazar, who was searching for Brenda, who was searching for Jax, along with Max who was searching for Jason and then searching for Brenda, and Jason who was searching for Alcazar and then searching for Brenda.  (Everybody take a deep breath.) 

Early in the week Brenda beat on the door of the safe house and then suddenly had an insight that a person who hadn’t made a sound was listening on the other side of the grate hidden under a table.  It’s not that she has a genetic brain disease or that she’s crazy, she just has undiagnosed ESP. 

How come Brenda hasn’t asked Jason about Robin?  I know, it’s not that important but I need these little history tie-ins. 

I’ve figured out the dynamics of Jason, Sonny, and women.  Sonny and his black silk sheets fulfill their sexual mobster fantasies while Jason provides the emotional bit.  Blend the two characters and they make a great romantic lead.  Jason comforted Brenda after her bad dream, saved then held Courtney after the mugger attack, hugs are reserved for Liz and Carly gets friendship and I’m not sure what else but it’s hardly ever what she deserves.  All this in one and a half episodes.  How much female emotional drama should one guy be expected to take?  My husband will deal about once a week with a little drama with a good reason (PMS usually works) but after that I better find a good friend or some Prozac.  

Carly and a baseball bat - watch out!  Maybe I can like a tough, smart Carly.  It’ll take awhile because smart hasn’t been one of her character traits to date.  I like tough and smart.  Alexis has always been a favorite for that reason.  Helena, while evil and completely amoral as a human being sparks admiration even while I detest her.  She is tough and smart – amoral – able to pay or blackmail others into leaping, burning or poisoning in a single bound.  I guess it goes for the guys too.  Jason represents the elite of tough and smart.  Sonny shows us emotional, tough, smart, but rationally challenged.  (He strapped a bomb on his waist and BLEW IT UP.  Zander – tough, demonstrates occasional glimpses of smart in between bouts of stupid.  By tough I mean able to handle difficulties in a rational manner without falling apart.  Or, you know, a baseball bat - whatever works. 

Carly and her baseball bat hooked me at the No Name but she promptly returned to character when she tricked Greg and followed him to the safe house.  Then Sonny tells her to stay put so she immediately leaves the room to search the rest of the house.  So I rolled my eyes mid week and then blinked in admiration as she again wielded the bat to drive away Scotty and Taggert on Friday.  On the one hand I liked the glimpse of MOB Boss Carly but on the other it’s reassuring to see that the destructo woman who ain’t got no sense lives on.  I can’t wait to see how Carly plays it at the MOB meeting this week. 

I learned something about myself this week.  It’s not pretty and I’m not proud of it, but here it is.  I am a toughguyaholic, probably in need of a 12-step program with the nearest toughaholics anonymous.  I say this because it took one episode (Tuesday) and withdrawal set in.  No Sonny, no Jason, no Zander and Carly was working with Liz in her wise understanding mode.  Nothing was wrong with the show; I just missed my tough guy players.  

I loved Carly’s face when Scotty spotted her in Kelly’s and kissed her cheek while offering his insincere condolences about Sonny.  Carly looked at him like he’d lost his marbles and then proceeded to wipe Scotty’s kooties off her cheek.  

There’s good news and bad news.  Rosie appeared this week – bigger and well trained but now Zander seems to be missing. 

Have you seen me?

Hit on the head recently.

May be wandering on the docks muttering about Florida, Emily, or crypts.

Please Mr. Guza, Mr. Pratt, can Alexis have something interesting to do?  Now that she’s retired as Sonny’s legal mistress, the only exciting case she’s handled was Luke and he fired her and then escaped.  I laughed when Alexis turned to Ned at the ultrasound appointment and said, “You’ve never been pregnant, have you.” 

I’ve been contemplating headstones and mottos this week.  Thinking about characters and what theirs should say.  Here are a few of my choices. 

Zander – I take a lickin, and keep on tickin’

Jason – Brain damaged, not stupid

Alexis- I am woman, hear me roar.  Give me air and a brown paper bag!

Ned – Suit/no Rock Star/no Suit/no Rock Star/ …

Sonny – Walk softly/Have sex/Carry a big stick

Carly – Psycho blond, occasional good intentions

Helena – The Real Ice Princess

Luke – On vacation

Stavros – Popsicle with a warped attitude

Bobbie – I loved everybody! 

No way is Coleman a stalker.  He must be on some protect Courtney/Daisy the woman/stripper of his dreams mission from the creepy voyeur/stalker. 

Name choices for Coleman so far in no particular order. 

Roosevelt (Rosie for short)




Shad, short for Shadrach





A suggestion was made that Coleman is his first name and he’s hiding his last name.  Perhaps that makes him a relative of Zander since his real name remains a mystery. 

Writing this column provides me with lots of entertainment each week.  Big thanks for feedback, suggestions and ideas.  Your replies and responses are appreciated.  Thanks for reading. 


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