So, it’s been more than two months since I did this, but how many times can you say “This show sucks!” without actually saying “This show sucks!”?  I even gave up watching all together during the time that Tony Geary was on vacation since Luke and Laura are the only reason worth the electricity it takes for me to tape.  An entire month without GH and I didn’t miss it one bit.  In truth, I haven’t seen enough of the show since L&L came back to offer much of an opinion on anything else….but since when has that stopped me?  Most of this is miscellaneous thoughts and a few shallow observations (I had to get that line in here somehow). 

Luke and Laura.  This story is ridiculous but if you just sit back flip the switch from the right brain to the left brain and just enjoy it for the comedy it’s pretty darn funny.  Laura looked good in that cowboy hat.  Sally Struthers has me doubled over with laughter every time she clicks her teeth at Luke.  I do take issue with one thing in this story--the gun.    

This is not a woman who cannot tell the difference between a toy and the real thing.  I wonder if she got searched at the airport?  They searched my carry on once because the aluminum foil on the little bag of Reeses Peanut Butter Cups set off the alarm. 

Liz/Lucky.  Cut your losses and break those two up--permanently!  It hasn’t worked since Jacob assumed the role of (CARL) Lucky Spencer.  End it and put us all out of our misery.  Lucky might work with NuSarah.  I like her so far.  Her presence is menacing to the Scoobies and that’s enough to amuse me but when she stopped by Wyndamere to give Nikolas a little hell about the blood test and *bonus* got to berate Gia for getting a new car while Elizabeth nearly died she won me over.  Now, if they’ll just make her a little bit naughty…. 

And, speaking of Gia, isn’t she the least little bit creeped out that she was licking the choppers of her presumed dead soon-to-be-father-in-law?  **skeeve** 

Zander/Carly and Jax/Skye don’t have that zing for me.  I’m far more interested in seeing Carly with Jax, despite my hatred for both characters I’m intrigued by the possibilities there.  I can tolerate Carly now that she’s away from Sonny and as long as she doesn’t do or say anything to or about AJ.   

Sonny is even less tolerable, however, now that he’s not with Carly.  His little mind games with Alexis are juvenile and tedious.  I will NEVER approve of those two as a couple but I’m to the point that I want them to have some hot-sweaty-rolling-on-the-floor-monkey-sex so Alexis can get it out of her system and move on to someone new.  In my mind it goes something like this: 

She’s in her penthouse working but unable to concentrate.  After several attempts to finish whatever she’s working on she gives up, has some popcorn, paces around the room, tries to work some more and finally just throws open the door, marches across the hall, nods to Johnny as she barges into Sonny’s penthouse.  She doesn’t speak to him when she finds him standing in front of the fireplace, drink in hand, watching the fire.  He asks her what she’s doing there as she’s coming toward him.  She says nothing, flings herself onto him, rides him like a pogo stick.  Afterwards she smoothes her mussed hair and strolls back across the hall leaving a quivering mass of stunned man on the floor. 

I couldn’t resist.  If I hear ONE more person whine about Sonny & Carly getting back together or what a monster Alexis is for fantasizing (whatever!) I am going to scream.  They’ve been separated for like six months.  Try being an L&L fan when they were separated for more than 3 years or a Nexis fan when they’ve been separated for over a year.  Quit yer bitchin’ and let the story play out!  It’s obvious even to those of us who leap on the FF button when they appear that they are going to get back together. 

Another couple that should be together is Courtney and AJ or CourAJ (pronounced: courage) as someone penned them.  How sickeningly adorable is that? :::rolling eyes:::: Alicia Leigh Willis is doing a great job and Billy Warlock is fabulous.  Can you imagine the table at Thanksgiving dinner?  Sonny, Carly, Courtney, AJ, Mike, Janine and little Michael trying to be civil to one another.  That’s a setting for gunplay if I ever saw one.  They need to run with this story and let Billy shine, besides, I really, really, really like Courtney.  She gives it to Sonny with both barrels and I often find myself applauding her for it.  Somebody in this city needs to show some cajones and not kowtow to the gummiebear mobster. 

Melissa was interesting after they made her a nutcase.   

Liz in the hospital and Audrey hasn’t made an appearance?  Or did she when I wasn’t looking? 

Now, for the most repulsive thing I’ve ever seen on GH.  (This is what you were all waiting on right?  You just wanted to see my head spin like Linda Blair’s, right?)  Ned and Kristina are revolting.  Mostly Kristina but he’s not too high on my applause meter either.  He should know better than to date Alexis’ sister.  It’s uncouth; however, I’ve devised a way—in my mind--- to excuse him and blame this all on Krissy since I hate her anyway.  After being abandoned at the alter and subsequently forgotten after that amazing serenade on the docks, watching Alexis slobber every time Sonny walks by and having been given permission to court the baby sister, Ned no longer has the obligation to protect Alexis’ feelings. {If everything Sonny does can be justified then I can certainly excuse MyNed for this}.  Kristina, on the other hand, knows better.  She stood in Alexis’ penthouse and told Alexis to “smother it” if Alexis ever felt drawn to one of her exes.  She does have the obligation to protect Alexis’ feelings because she’s her sister.  It ought to be skeeving them all out.  I never want to swap spit with someone who’s had his tongue in my sister’s…..mouth. 

He needs to be moved far away from Krissy and into this plot with Edward to take over ELQ and in the process discover that Skye really isn’t Alan’s daughter.  THEN, Ned and Skye can hook up.  Ned and Skye have the I-hate-you-so-much-I-want-to-jump-your-bones kind of chemistry that is being forced between Jax and Skye. 

Do I even have to type out the joke here or is everyone good to think it on your own?  Now if Alexis had walked in on *that* scene…. 

And, as for Alexis’ reaction I don’t feel sorry for her at all….

If Alexis had, just one time….just once, been honest about any of her feelings none of this would be happening.

If she’d been honest with Ned about her fears over the wedding….no runaway bride….

If she’d be honest with Sonny about wanting to ride him like a pogo stick….no stupid fantasies….

If she’d be honest with Krissy about the skeeve factor….no Ned/Krissy near-boinkfest….

If she’d been honest with Stefan about her incest-ual feelings….wait..that was me who wanted Stefan/Alexis, nevermind.

Yeah, she was upset...but paybacks are hell and Ned has had to watch her fawn over Sonny for months.

Speak up woman....or LET IT GO!  

And, lastly, for those of you who wonder what manner of cyber mischief I’ve created in lieu of this commentary here is one fine example: AKA slideshow

Kristina fans should avoid it.  It’ll just knot your panties all up nine ways from Sunday. 

Two final thoughts on the other shows:

OLTL:  GO LINDSAY!!  Woohoo!

PC:  With Angels like these, who needs the devil?  Although, Rafe is the kind of angel I wouldn’t mind being touched by. 

~Tracey~

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