How long could I make this column if I wanted to really dish about the parade of bad dominatrix clothing that Brenda apparently dragged across the ocean from Europe?  I say that because I’m just not seeing anything like the stuff she is wearing in any of the shops around here.  Sometimes I even fancy a spin on the net around the runways of various designers and really, there ain’t no style like the one she’s got…anywhere!  From the back brace contraption to the bra/ribbon/lace hankie combo she wore to the Q “She’s Aliiive” party, my favorite description of our lovely thus far is “Euro Trash Barbie”.  Read that on another message board and in true Brenda fashion, just couldn’t stop giggling.  I could go on about the panties peeking out from her jeans and how I’m really NOT convinced that it’s sexy in a cutesy, avant-garde way, but nah… 

Remember when Brenda told Carly she looked pretty in the Jason/Sonny hallway?  I love their interactions and it just really reinforces my campaign to keep Brenda across the hall, but I have to say that yes, ETB was right…Carly looked SPECTACULAR in brown suede pants and a goldish beige turtleneck.  She is so reed thin and that was just a perfect look for her body type.  Her new haircut is really nice too – I’m glad Carly is really starting to show some style.  Except that, well, you know, sometimes a girl just can’t resist red sequins.  I didn’t write a fashion column after the island escapade, but I am so endeared to Carly’s character after her drunkenness that I may never have another negative word about her freaky clothes again.  Pretty funny stuff it was.  (I just watched the new Star Wars so you’ll have to forgive my tendency to write like Yoda at the moment). 

The loveliest girl in Port Charles (at least in my redheaded opinion ;) has been hitting the bottle but she sure is making some delightful choices in evening wear.  Skye’s “She’s Aliiive” party dress was so stunning!  If I had a Christmas party to attend (sigh), I’d want that dress.  And that coat.  And the shoes.  She is a true vision in deep burgundy satin and velvet and I’m so glad somebody got a little of that Alcazar lovin’ besides Brenda.  She gets all the lovin’ and it’s only fair that Skye sees what really kept Brenda on that yacht for four years, right?  Oh Alcazar, I will miss your style.  General Hospital is just lucky that Ric (or whatever the heck his name is) is dressed well.  I would have had to mutiny if I were completely Armani deficient.  

And then speaking of Armani deficient, what in the complete hell has Sonny done to his wardrobe?  Love the haircut but I can’t take another day of him in that purple shirt.  Cheap, cheap, cheap…  Somebody needs to tell him that K-Mart takes returns on the stuff Carly gives him for Christmas.  Meow… 

OK…so how many of you multi-soap watchers noticed that Monica wore the same suit to the “She’s Aliiive” party that Lindsay wore to Jen and Cristian’s non-wedding?  It was nothing I would have duplicated and I certainly wouldn’t peg Monica and Lindsay as style sisters, but hey…who asked me?  

As if they aren’t killing me enough by killing Alcazar (sniff), I’m seeing lots of Lucky onscreen again.  The Fashion Police are grossly opposed to working overtime and when Lucky’s around, well…there’s no donut breaks on THAT shift.   Lucky needs to date Gia if only so she can whip his wardrobe into shape.  Maybe we could see Elton again if he took Laura’s little boy shopping?  

Ooh…we did get to see Mac in a suit at the “She’s Aliiive” party.  His hair is getting longer (sigh).  I know how y’all love Ned but I will never comprehend a universe where that man gets so much more screen time than Mac.  John J. York has such a clean, upstanding SEX appeal and ya know, not just everyone can make cute in a sweater vest.  Ned needs a few weeks off just to recover from that last haircut.  It’s unfair dear diary, it’s just so very unfair… 

And so we are back to work, trying to sneak a peak under Alexis’ oversized and unattractive (naturally…) sweatshirt to determine if those are maternity jeans.  I KNOW she’s not buttoning her old ones yet.  I guess we’re not getting any nursing blouses or comedic scene one where Nancy Lee Grahn wrestles a breast pump.  Ah well, at least we got our peanut (and she’s a cute one, eh?  I just bought a pair of ‘em at Toys R’ Us the other day).  :)



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