Sept 19, 2005
Welcome! It seems like years since we were last sitting here gabbing about the soaps. The spoilers for this week seem to really be heating up and I am eager to see how it all unfolds on the screen. Let's not waste time with chit chat! It's down to the bones of talking soap spoilers!
Julia, Julia, Julia... just when I thought I couldn't not possibly hate you more, just when my memories of you were being mulled by time and the scab turning into protective scar tissue, back you come with your Santos wannabe tough girl attitude when you really are still just Hector's little bitch. The "I'm so tough and belligerent, but I'm vulnerable and a victim too" grates on me after about 2 seconds or so and I'm starting to find myself leaving the room any time she's on. Oh yeah, she's a rebel, she's a lone wolf, she's a pitbull, she's on my very last nerve. My deepest hope is that Noah is really alive and comes back for his beloved wife, carrying her away to places unknown (I'd vote California with Maria and Maddie, two other insufferable Santos women, PLUS the pain-in-the-ass Mateo, but I *live* in California and having them here even facetiously is a frightening thought) ne'er to be heard from again. I'd be at the studio door doing my best David Spade, "Buh-bye, buh-bye, buh-bye. Here's you, 'yaddayaddayadda' and here's me, 'buh-bye.'"
Di might actually be pulling off this "I am Dixie" thing because I'm starting to hate her as much as I hated Dixie even on a good day. Maybe she really is Dixie.
Zendall fans were through a big soup bone this week with the confession of their favorite couple admitting that they are deeply in like with one another. Whether that will parlay into any kind of deeper attachment this week is yet to be seen, but my bet is on a continued slow burn until it culminates in a raging passionate clutch at some point.
Proving that there is (evidently) absolutely nothing new under the sun, AMC blatantly rips off the Roxy and Max story from OLTL, instead using Adam and Krystal in Crow Hollow. It will be interesting to see if it plays out as well as OLTL's wonderful masterpiece of a story (despite the resounding thud of them dropping the ball after a brilliant take off). Of course, Krystal, so altruistic and benevolent, does not hesitate to use the situation of waking up as Mrs Chandler after a drunken night to take Adam for half of his worth. Yep, she's really changed. Oh, look out. Some of my sarcasm dripped on your new shoes.
Proving that all JR really wants beneath his gruff and childishly angry and vindictive facade is to be wuvvvved, Babe inches her way into his affections. Since it appears that Jamie is a doctor now, 45 seconds after being granted Aunt Phoebe's money, maybe Babe can become a heroine in an even quicker amount of time.
Garrett continues to display his creepy attraction to Danielle by showing up in her bathroom as she's coming out of the shower. Danielle, in turn, pulls of the soap coup de farce by announcing his creepiness to the whole world at her mother's wedding. Tit meet tat, I guess. Oh and there's that thing of Josh punching out Garrett at his own wedding. Not exactly a dream day for either the bride or the groom, it seems. Mimi, of course, being Mimi (she should have just cut the pretences and spelled it "MeMe") does not believe Dani and ends up marrying Garrett anyway. The clichés are rolling fast and hard here, folks. Shouldn't it be Derek who is punching out Garrett rather than Josh?
Everyone is looking for the Dragan... have they
checked Dani's bathroom yet? I think he might be there...
OLTL SPOILER COMMENTARY
Whether or not Evangeline is a fool is highly debatable and subjective; however, I am fully grateful to have her digging her teeth into this story. I could go on watching Carlo needle Cris indefinitely, but having him out playing spoiler is even better. I am still all for an Evangeline and Cris pairing, just to make things all square and balanced, but I doubt I'll get my little wish.
I would think it would be the other way around; that Evangeline would be the one understanding the need for discretion in such a delicate case. He shouldn't have to talk her into it (give her a mark on the "fool" side).
So he'll sit in the dawk like a dawg and pout? Be pro-active, boy!
If Evangeline isn't incredibly burdened by something, it's not a day that ends in Y.
And our story doesn't move unless the stalemate shifts in some way.
Which doesn't mean he killed her, mind you.
Get it? Keel? Boat? As Kelly says, I crack myself up.
Or just ceased to be, whichever.
She's sharp and she's not stupid, which could work in opposite directions in this situation.
And she can do math.
And vice versa.
Zzzz. Oh I am sorry, was I SLEEPING????
Works for me. If we can't have the "real"
Clint, I'm all for a recast to get the story moving. Right now, it's
not realistic that Clint is nowhere to be found with all that Viki,
Jessica and Natalie have been going through, not to mention Asa's
"circling of the wagons." I am definitely excited about the return
of Clint and look forward to the stories!
GH SPOILER COMMENTARY
Then Sonny is just not being persistent enough. If Sam can get past the obstacle of Jason not remembering her and get him to stick around, surely Sonny can as well!
You just can't get good help these days.
Jason has never done well with Amnesia Peer Pressure, so this move does not surprise me in the least.
Maybe more of the experimental drug? I'm just reaching for straws here.
Probably the only quiet place he can find.
But not a flood of love for Sonny? What's the world coming to?
Not nearly explosive and violent enough, is it?
Yeah, well never underestimate Carly's bonker potential.
Oooh, good police work, Lucky!
The one where the lighting is bad and he says, "Oh baby" a lot?
Does anyone believe this guy any more?
That's sweet, but I'd get it in writing.
This sounds suspicious, but I'll take it at face value.
This poor guy can NEVER make it through a wedding, can he?
I wonder if he is going to borrow the ultraexpensive fake baby used in the premie-Kristina scenes and try to fake Elizabeth out after the birth.
See? Ice cream really is bad for you. And why the hell is Carly driving? Is she so crazy she thinks she can?
I had a feeling this kid was doomed from the start.
Since she's a mobster now, why not?
Best to not let the killers face any kind of retribution, right?
At least pretend it's not Sonny's island, OK set people?
Is this where he finds out about Lucas? The mind boggles.
AGAIN???? Ric is just a walking catastrophe, isn't he? I wondered where the end of Carly (at least temporarily) would come, but now that she's messing with Emily, the Patron Saint of Absolutely Everything, we can figure it's pretty well over...
As is this week's column!
Spoilers commentary from:
Sept 12, 2004
Sept 5, 2005
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