“rain drought” 

“fat idiot” 

“you are invited to a wedding” 

“’I used to like Chris Rock, until he bashed Bush at the Oscars.’” 

“if I hear YMCA one more time…” 

“could princess be my savior?”

“left my comb in Ozona”

"vanilla bean noel"

“closer to amusement”



“hey man, are you alive in there?” 

“windmills in the dark” 

“I can’t feel my hands!”

“Zechariah John”

“I wanna be jealous like you”

“christ complex”

“we’re on sun mountain lodge”

“pass the corn”

“have it!”

“hit alt.”

“chicks, cars and bikes”

“secret competition”

“before bed”

“my TV so far”

don’t look too closely” 

“the greatness (and the curse) that
is the McDonald’s Happy Meal toy”

“where’s my interview?” 

“on the cusp”

“they call it paradise” 

“other people”

"don’t call it the Olympics"

“gay, as in happy?”

“a time in September, or was it March?”

“it wasn’t iced tea”

“five dollar bite” 

"nicotine cake"

“it’s all going in the report” 

an alarm in every pearl”


“acuity, based on People magazine” 

“almost four months to the day”

“$17.87 ...”

“Welcome to Taco Bell.
How may we fuck with your order?” 

“dammit with the Coke”

“back to the Coca-Cola thing”

“a Coke (in crushed ice), a smile and life’s saving grace” 

“If she’s not a sistah, what the fuck am I ...
a Chink fouling up the purebred white boy next door?”

“the Nietzsche of ordering a plain salad with dressing on the side, or
Are you at a farm milking the cow for my chocolate milkshake or does it always take a hundred years around here?!”

"what's in a name?"

"the cough that terrorized a nation"


"party or moonlight?"

“the real Passion 

“Old School Soap just wrapped up on PBS” 

“Some [Fusion] friendship” 


“before Graham Kerr”

“It’s called ALL My Children, and it is”  

"About a Forward"

“I love— Ah, shaddup!”

“Lawyers, you’ve been replaced.”

“No one notices the rebounder.”

“Ten bucks a day?!"

“Is it too late to change my major?” 


"docked in tinsel"


“God blessed us all with gifts. Or... did He?” 

“cancer as aphrodisiac”

"you in the choir?"

"14 years"


"lake bluto"

"la lucci"

"heart's desire"

"rhythmic drops"

“AMC, kinda sorta maybe better”

“an audience of one” 

“add a real dose of reality-TV to soaps” 

“Bianca sucks, let’s rape her!”

"5 nuns"




"What Happened to My Erection?"


"Lookin Like..."




Coggie on SARS