This is a simple column by a complex woman.  
Dumb-asses need not apply.
If you flatter yourself to be
a bright spot in the universe
and aren't offended by "psychotic breaks,"
If you're a little frightened, well, all the better.
We kinda like you like that... with hot sauce.

“No one notices the rebounder.”

By now, you’ve probably heard about several good (and I don’t mean that lightly) actors being terminated from their contracts and their verbal promises of some airtime with TPTB at GH. 

These are – for the most part – extremely qualified, hard-working thespians who’ve been relegated either as props or as elevated day players in order to – more or less – refocus 90 percent of the attention back on the core characters and core storyline involving the mob. 

John Ingle (Edward) – although Katrina tells me he signed a contract to recur after fans mobbed, no pun intended, TPTB’s and his mailbox with their disapproval, Kin Shriner (Scott) – who opted out graciously instead of taking a salary cut, Chad Brannon (Zander) – who posted on his website’s message forum that he opted out graciously, for the movies and primetime, but rumor has his ouster the result of a higher-up’s passive-aggressive push, Lane Davies (Cameron) – who, after months and months and then more months of denying an enforced exit, finally relented and revealed as much on his website’s message forum, Billy Warlock (A.J.) – who did his bosses a favor months and months before the writing was already on the wall on his reduced presence by stalling with denials until he graciously took the hit, without a company-sponsored farewell party no less...

On the rumored chopping block, more missed opportunities, wasted potential, Greg Vaughan (Lucky), Ted King (Lorenzo), Blake Gibbons (Coleman), and a few more I can’t mention, because my heart is breaking. 

However, did you also hear the one about a couple of decent, trusted, considerate people, professional journalists, thought-provoking, creatively inclined writers and genuine columnists – those who do it for the passion, the joy, the art and the best of the fans, not the notoriety, the acclaim, the crown of “Best Scoopster” – who received juicy, controversial, tantalizing, damaging, ACCURATE insider information, but had to keep quiet altogether or keep quiet for just a few days (with the publicized info greatly drastically paraphrased so as to protect the innocent) out of an ingrained sense of integrity because the reliable source(s) requested such confidentiality? Only to find said info as the latest breaking news from another, less-reputable (but more scoop-acclaimed and frequently referred to on message boards) site? 

Or maybe you missed the one about a real nice person and real good writer (and I don’t mean that lightly) who learned about every single skeleton in every single GH actor’s closet, dates, times, places, witnesses, quotes, the kind that would traumatize the most diehard, blindly devoted fan base? But instead of airing dirty laundry in public, chose to take the high road, ignore the negative human foibles of these actors and focus on their public behavior and their acting choices? Only to repeatedly be bombarded by fans, fan bases, industry types and presidents of fan clubs with accusations of baseless below-the-belt bashing and vicious favoritism simply for repeating public reports related to characterization, storyline preferences, performances, fan opinions and public behavior as gossip. 

Worse, these good columnists with their solid writing credentials, compassionate souls and rare integrity are frequently lambasted by fans and fan bases in e-mails and on message boards, public and private, for not scoring the latest, bestest, scandalous scoops before anybody else (meaning the fans and fan bases posting on message boards every chance they get, 24/7). 

For their trouble, these same columnists must endure on a daily basis the following abuse for:

  • Mentioning their personal lives

  • Applauding fellow columnists

  • Applauding fans and fan bases

  • Criticizing the above

  • (Not?) having a life

  • Loving cats and children

  • Their physical appearance

  • Going above and beyond the call of duty in strong opinions, with strong descriptives

  • Sticking their neck out for a losing, unpopular cause

  • Refusing to divulge a confidentiality

Most of these columnists, myself included, don’t really seek the top Scoopster spot, or even the kind of nagging, stalker fame of other more notorious columnists. But they’re human, they’ve got some pride, and just once, it’d be nice if they could be first with an interesting scoop, AND, keep their asses covered by honoring confidentiality. 

They might change their mind if they ever heard the one about a SoapZone “News & Gossip” columnist who actually got a chance to give details about a reputed staff meeting with a GH executive producer and her actors when other sites merely danced around the issue with metaphor, analogy and underline on the strictly gossip part, did, and caught hell from one of the actors and his devoted, diehard fans for being irresponsible, unprofessional, stupid, egotistical as to print a totally false piece of bullshit as news (actually, printed as and under gossip), with threats and insults mixed in. 

I call these people, numbering unfortunately in the major minority of life, REBOUNDERS, from my beloved favorite game of basketball. 

Back when I could do a cartwheel without throwing my back out and getting sciatic nerve damage in my groin, about age 11, 12, I played b-ball as a forward for two years running. I also played softball as a left fielder and filled in as a catcher for several games when the catcher we had went on vacation. During this sporty time, I discovered an athletic skill that pretty much went ignored in the crowd. It’s ignored routinely in the NBA as well. 

I became a very good (and I don’t mean that lightly) rebounder, meaning, if the ball ever ended up in the air for whatever reason, I almost always ended up with it to pass to the best freethrow shooter or lay-up guard. I could also kick ass on other aspects of defense, from stealing the ball from the other team to blocking a pass made by the other team and performing a textbook fast break. Aside from one basket I made in a Hail Mary incident in a New York City game, however, I sucked at offense, the arena 99.9 percent of the crowd actually pays attention to. Michael Jordan didn’t become infamous because he could rebound, but because he could score. I noticed his then-teammate Dennis Rodman, not because he dressed like a drag queen and fucked Carmen Electra off the court, but because he was the Chicago Bulls’ best rebounder. THAT impressed the hell out of me. 

When I watch any sport, not just basketball, my eyes are glued to the invisible players, the backbone often treated as the background without whom the entire team couldn’t get the job done. I admire a nice save, a spiraling serve, a perfectly arced pass BEFORE the spike in a volleyball game, a perfect by-the-book tackle of anybody BUT the receiver in football, a tough catch to end the inning and the game by the shortstop in baseball ... well, you get the drift. 

It’s these rebounders that nobody else cares about or notices, the Steely Dans of music, the Billy Warlocks of soaps, the Damian Lewises of movies, the Katrinas and the Coggies of soap columnists, that deserve as much, if not more kudos from the narrow field of the easily amused attention deficit disorderly crowd who just can’t seem to keep their eyes off a train wreck involving a bevy of artificially enhanced falsettos. 

They’re really really REALLY good, these rebounders. You’d agree, if you paid any attention outside of Britney Spears, Brad Pitt, Jennifer Aniston and the Wiggles party line. 

When I read of the rapid firings (and not-so-subtle forced resignations) of several really really REALLY good GH actors last week, I wasn’t really very surprised either. 

It’s hard to notice originality, generosity, courage, decency, and all those other really good things, when you’re too busy awed by a three-pointer in jazzy clothes, or the loud, glass-throwing melodramatics of an obvious anti-hero. 

But if Sonny never had his rebounder... 

Same goes for those columnists who’d rather honor their word than out-scoop the competition and be the flavor of the week on various message boards. 

Next time you bozos are tempted to rag on Katrina, for example, for never coming up with new scoops ahead of the game, snark that she doesn’t know shit, and brag about how much YOU already always know or have read on your precious cliqueish board, think again. 

Katrina probably knew, weeks, months ahead of you. She probably knows a hell of a lot more than you could possibly fathom in your wildest imaginative gossip CPs. She definitely has DONE more in the name of covering soaps than you and your little Tupperware biddies could possibly do when you’re not hitting REFRESH on your precious cliqueish message board every 15 minutes for eight hours every day ... like, um, actually talk with and interview several GH actors. 

[Try transcribing hours and hours of interview time AND putting it all together in a neatly flowing, comprehensively cohesive feature story on your day off, smart-ass.] 

The difference is, Katrina Rasbold—“Eye on Soaps” site owner and “Scoop-a-holics” gossip columnist—is not out there on her soapbox loudly bragging about all she knows and all she does at every opportunity. 

She’s in the background, rebounding, so the genre itself—the true star in this game—can continue to thrive despite a weakening economy and dwindling viewership interest. 

I’ll take one of her any day.


“Ten bucks a day?!"

“Is it too late to change my major?” 


"docked in tinsel"


“God blessed us all with gifts. Or... did He?” 

“cancer as aphrodisiac”

"you in the choir?"

"14 years"


"lake bluto"

"la lucci"

"heart's desire"

"rhythmic drops"

“AMC, kinda sorta maybe better”

“an audience of one” 

“add a real dose of reality-TV to soaps” 

“Bianca sucks, let’s rape her!”

"5 nuns"




"What Happened to My Erection?"


"Lookin Like..."




Coggie on SARS

"For What It's Worth"
Soap Town USA

"General Hospital News and Gossip"
Soap Zone