Well, hello there, pretty lady.  Welcome to our little place on the net.  My name is *Sage Bourland*, but you may call me "Sage," "Big Booty Daddy" or "Sagelicious" as I am sometimes referred to among friends.  *chuckle* 

Are you lonely?  Tired?  Broke as a joke?  Tired of being slaughtered and quartered on other message boards?  Lusting after ABC soap stars who do not have the opportunity to behold your beauty, much less make use of your carnal expertise?  Is your life, well, a little dull and dreary with that day in and out and in and out boring routine?

I'm here to help.

With a minimal investment of time and only as much energy as you care to contribute, you too can become one of the Lovely Sage Brush Ranch Ho's.  I'm the mayor of a quaint little town called "Sageville," home to the prosperous and opulent "Sage Brush Ranch" on beautiful Creamed Corn Blvd.  We provide special services to many of the top stars of ABC Daytime.

Worried your favorite client is already taken?  Hard-ly!  We have a special cloning process that takes the pull and tug out of a joint claim.  Of course, if you insist on the real thing, you can always pull your opponent into the creamed corn or jello pools and wrassle it out!

Interested?  Baby, I know you are.  You're one of a kind.  Where has Andreas been, you ask?  Honey, he's right here with the aromatherapy oil and a massage table with your name on it.  Played "Clue" lately?  Well, in our version, Jake (the Snake) Martin did it in the Sauna with a Ranch Resident.  Dr Hard-y is alive and well at the Sage Brush Ranch and Frisky-o Jones is a Resident favorite!  Staff-ros Cassadine is all ready for action, as is An-bone-io Vega.  Mac Score-pio and Ned Ass-ton are standing in line, waiting for you!!  

Suddenly, that half done TV dinner isn't looking as appealing, is it?  

Come.  Be with us in a land of love, health, joy, romping and playing where your fantasies ARE your life.  PLUS, as a Resident you get half the cut!  Check out our links below and tell me, do you want to be a Resident?