December 10, 2004

"Have life and have it more abundantly."  How beautifully said.  I truly believe that God/Goddess, The Universe, Deity, whatever you want to call the ultimate power in the Universe wants us to be happy and joyful.  There is no shame or dishonor in abundance.  Abundance is something that is there for you to accept into your life, to embrace as the gift that it is and say thank you.  We don't have to torture ourselves with how unworthy we are and mumble about how others deserve abundance more than we do.  God does not make mistakes.  When we are given wonderful gifts of abundance, it is because we deserve it, or else it would not happen.  Do we really know so much more than God?

Remember my calla lilies?  As a quick history lesson for newcomers, for a couple of years, Eric was frequently out of work and we were pretty much living by the skin of our teeth.  It was a really hairy time.  As I look back on it now, I don't know how in the world we made it through, but we sure did, one day and one miracle at a time.  Anyway, I had this giant thatch of calla lilies by my front door and for two years, they never bloomed, then one very depressed day in the middle of December, I went outside to find them alive with blooms where none had been just hours before.  After that, those little calla lilies were 100% accurate at predicting the miracles that were coming, right down to the number of miracles equaling the number of blooms.

Tuesday night, Eric was trying to start a fire in the wood stove (it's been rainy, so the wood, even though it is covered with a tarp, is cantankerous because the moisture manages to seep into it no matter what you do.  He pulled out a handful of newspaper to get it going and when he happened to open the newspaper, the words "calla lilies" caught his eye immediately.  When he remarked on it, I said, "the miracles are coming again." 

Even with the ground hard, my beloved lilies (what few I could get up here) eaten to the ground by deer and the original ones now blooming by Erica's door (the lady who moved into my house) instead of mine, they were able to reach out to me and send their message.  I wonder if Erica's ($270,000) callas are blooming for me now as well.  For as much as she paid for her house, they'd better be tuned to her by now.  ;)  Something tells me those little suckers are in full bloom right now.

The past month has been rocky.  We were put in a financial situation where decisions had to be made that we didn't want to make.  Getting the car was hard, but necessary.  We get tons of snow and driving a huge boat like the Caprice over the icy ledges that go straight off the mountain isn't wise.  In fact, Eric would likely not be able to get to work.  So yes, it had to be done and I am glad it was done, but wow.  It killed us right in time for Christmas.

We are still fairly toasted for this month.  Thanks to some little miracles that showed themselves, I'll be able to get some Christmas presents for the kids, which I didn't expect before.  Gifts for myself and Eric are coming from The Universe, for which I am truly grateful.  ("What a great mom and dad!!")  Slowly but surely, it is all working out, or appears to be.  No, let's think affirmatively.  It is working out!

As many of you know, I have been home schooling Dylan this year.  It was the best choice for everyone, but I've got to tell you, it's not for lightweights.  He's probably one of the best candidates for it and still, it's challenging in all the ways you can imagine home schooling to be challenging, even with a teacher at the big elementary school in town as a proctor.  At Nathan's parent teacher conference 2-3 weeks ago, his teacher, who is also the principal of the school, told me that there was a chance Dylan might be able to get into the little school when the kids go back to school after New Year's.  (!adoing!)  We were told previously that he might not even be able to get in next year!  With this thought firmly planted in the O Happy Day part of my brain, I eagerly awaited confirmation.  Unfortunately, what I heard from the teacher/principal was that the superintendent didn't want to go for it.  By Dylan being in the home school program through the big school, they get funding on a per kid basis and he's one of the kids.  If he goes to the little school, they lose that money and it is not compensated because if schools have less than 50 children (our little school has a total enrollment of 36 kids in grades K-5), there is a flat rate compensation rather than a per kid allowance.  Uh oh.  So I went to work with my handy dandy fax machine (about the only thing Eric ended up with to the positive from his year long endeavor at "going into business" with someone) and jetted out a heart-felt letter (I can tell you this, it literally included the phrase, "Begging available upon request or as needed.") to Mr Superintendent and when I talked to the principal again on Wednesday, she said, "Unofficially officially, he's in."  The Superintendent is not at work again until Monday, so I hope to get a definitive answer then.  Think good thoughts!

If Dylan is able to get into the little school, that means in as short a time as three weeks, I would be spending my days totally on my own!  I have NEVER been alone like that.  My family was always bustling with activity between myself, my parents and my two brothers, not to mention about 30 cousins.  I had Joey before I left home, so when I married Paul in 1978, I already had a child.  From then on, I have always had children at home in various numbers and ages.  Now, Delena is 12, Dylan is 7 and Nathan is 5.  It leaves me breathless with excitement to think of having day after day after day of long hours to myself.  I swear to you, I'm tearing up right now just talking about it.  It also helps that Dylan will be so happy in this school.  He and Nathan get along great and they will be in the same classroom (K-2 are together in one room and 3-5 are in the next room).  So it is a good thing for everyone.  Once he is in, I will feel like I have run a (too long) marathon and have finally hit the finish line.  Diva, here I come!  So that is a really, really good thing (definitely a miracle) and I am just giddy with excitement over it.  THAT is my Christmas gift from the Universe.

THEN, there was more!  Erica, who bought our old house, is a mortgage broker and when Eric went to pick up his skis which he'd left up in the rafters of the garage, she mentioned that they had already refinanced the house.  ?!  I mean, they just bought this place in May-June!  Eric talked to her for a while and we decided to give it a try.  Our finance company, which is also our bank, wouldn't even attempt a refi until we'd had the house for a year without going by the original appraisal, which wouldn't help us much. 

Now for some more back story. Two years ago (can you believe it has been that long?!) which Eric was first out of work, we had to have our vehicle voluntarily repossessed.  We'd only had it for about a year, so we pretty much got hosed.  After the finance company re-sold the car, there was nearly a $13,000 deficit that we had to pay.  We worked out payments of $150 a month, but that pretty much covered the interest.  So now, two years later, we still owed them $12,000.  A couple of months ago, Eric and I got a copy of our credit report and found that this finance company that we had been paying for two years was reporting the debt as a charge off.  WTF??  So Eric called them up before we paid them that month and told them that he wasn't going to send them any more money until it was reporting correctly on the credit report (I mean, how much worse could it get than a charge off?) and that he would be contacting a lawyer to find out how to proceed with being compensated for the damage we had incurred (my husband is a marvelous bullshit artist) by this erroneous reporting, considering that we'd just bought a house at 7.5% interest and a car at horrible interest as a result.  We never heard from them again.  When we were working on the refi, I told Erica about the repo.  When she ran the credit report, she said, "Well, everything here looks good..."  I asked about the repo and she said, "I don't see a repo reporting."  I told her the name of the finance company and she said, "Oh, they are reporting the account as paid in full."  I nearly dropped the phone.  This company is blowing off $12,000 due to a clerical error they made for who knows how long in reporting it as a charge off. 

Since that was the only negative item on Eric's credit report (mine shall not be discussed), he's now golden.  Erica said the refi to 6% fixed interest rate should be no problem at all.  The best news is that with the equity we have built in the house over the past 7 months, we can pay off the jeep, plus a couple of other major bills, get Eric's laser eye surgery he very much needs and have our payments still be about $100 lower than they are now.  Between that and the money we will save by paying off the bills, it will be as though I got a part time job.  This should be just enough to save us.  It should be finalized the first week of January, so all I have to do is get us through December intact.  I have to make our mortgage by the 16th of this month, keep our utilities on and get Christmas for the kids (groceries and gas for Eric to get to and from work as well).  Make it through December and all should be well.

So that is three very major miracles:  Dylan in school, the refi itself and the news about the repo loan that the refi brought.  Two out of three are not a done deal yet, but the callas never lie.

This is a couple of hours later.  Got pulled away to help Dylan with his school work and while we were busy, the superintendent called to confirm that Dylan starts on January 3rd for certain!!!!  I am so tremendously excited.  So is he.

"Have life and have it more abundantly."  I have definitely felt the abundance this week. 

I know there are more things I wanted to tell you, but my brain is going so fast I can't seem to get it focused.  I might be back later.  If not, see you next week! 

Oh and today's work out was "Yoga For Weight Loss" by Suzanne Deason.  My feet went numb in a few places and I definitely felt the burn at times.  Also a little sore from this one!  I love having choices for my work outs!

Take care,