May 14, 2003

Spending some Dr Phil time establishing that I am, indeed, the boss.  This one to the left is the one who is challenging me, every bit his daddy's boy and willful as all get out.  I adore him (you know I do), but da-yum.  He has been on such a tear lately that you would not believe it.  He throws things, he hits his brother, he is defiant and he is soooo whiney lately, so I've been spending intensive time with him, trying to get it worked out.  I'm sure it's just a phase he's going through, but he has always been a demanding little soul and now he and I are having to have a meeting of the minds.  I'd say if you don't hear from me for a few days to not worry, but then, if you don't hear from me, maybe you should worry quite a lot. He's very, very creative in his rebellion. 

Conveniently, Dr Phil had a wonderful show on how to deal with kids this week and one of the most valuable things he said that really struck a chord with me was "A child needs to be able to predict, one hundred percent of the time, the consequences of their actions."  I could seriously see the falling down of consistency of my discipline and so I'm doing what he suggested and taking 30 days to let the rubber hit the road and stay very steadfast in the consequences department.  Delena is really, really responding beautifully and doing well.  She even cleaned her room.  Dylan is very seldom a discipline problem, just being one of those perfect kids.  Nathan is a total wild child and has been a challenge since he was a newborn.  His brain is always working and he has boundless energy.  Eric's engineer genes come through loud and clear, as does the tactile interest.  He is tremendously fascinated by how things feel (butter, flour, dried beans) and cause and effect (if I dump this, it makes a cool sound when it falls, if I throw this, it breaks against the wall is a spectacular explosion).  While I was typing yesterday's nonsoapy, he was quiet for a bit (supposedly watching Dora the Explorer) and I found him standing on the dining room table on a pile of books he'd scavenged from the book shelves, unscrewing the lightbulbs from the overhead light (it's a hanging thing).  As I said, he's very inventive.

So I'll be busy with Mr Adventure for the next few days.  Maybe I can get him interested in some spectacular housecleaning cause and effect.

In the mean time, here is a reprint from an old journal that definitely bears repeating.  You should get someone to do it for you!  (trust me)

The Glory of Ear Massages:

“Ear massages?” you might ask.  “Definitely,” I would reply with a knowing smile.  Ear massages for the Rasbolds came into being a month or two after we first got married.  We were talking about reflexology and acupressure and how the pressure points in the feet, hands and ears worked as conduits to very nearly the entire rest of the body.  I told Eric, who as not in the position to know such things, that when a good  manicurist gives you a manicure, they thoroughly massage your hands, which feels marvelous.  Every living soul knows how great a foot massage feels (when well done) and that the effects relax your whole body and make you believe that it’s entirely possible that walking is merely the secondary function of the feet, the first being to promote ecstasy and well being to the whole bod.  

This led us to wonder that if the feet and hands are such points of bliss, would the ears not be as well, given that they are a major acupressure and acupuncture site?  Tentatively, I gave him an ear massage, worried that it was going to feel squirrelly or wet-willyish.  Au contraire.  Quite by accident of speculation, we stumbled upon yet another garden of ecstasy, one that you must try (unfortunately, like tickling, you can’t do it to yourself).  Using your thumb and forefinger, begin by massaging the lobe and working your way up the arch of the ear, being sure to get well into the curves and crevices of the ear.  Follow the bend of the ear all the way up into the top folds.  Massage the head, directly around all area where the ear connects.  Massage into the ear holes as well.  Do this for no less than 3 minutes on each side and you will have a friend for life.  Give them a foot and hand massage as well and they’ll never leave your side.

Have a great evening!!

***Psst*** wish me luck.

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