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Welcome to ME!!  

I'm glad you're here.  If you are coming with an open mind and happy heart, then you are doubly welcome.  If you are here to pick a fight and drink your haterade, then my kitty above does all the talking.

Come in, pour a drink, put on your fuzzy bunny slippers and let's dish the soaps!


Please, let us remember, people have opinions that are sometimes in conflict.  If you don't agree with the opinions expressed in this column, please understand it was in no way intended to offend.  It's just like, my opinion, man.  (Love that Lebowski!)

(Yes, Sage is a
guy... and a
damned good
looking one too!)

June 21, 2005

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Happy Summer, you gorgeous thang, you!  It's great to be back in the loving arms of the EOS readership!  I'd do a little stage diving feel all your sweet hands on me, pushing me around the room, but let's face it, I'm old and we have soaps to dish, so pull up a chair, pour your favorite drink of choice and let's get started talking soaps!


It takes more than a quivering lip and a bleated "Mommeeee" to win me over to JR and be manipulated into thinking that the walls have come tumbling down and his asshole facade has crumbled.  In his case, asshole like that goes through to the BONE, lovey.  (and that's not a very pretty mental image for me to conjure up, believe me)  The Dianna/Dixie store has definitely been pulling at heart strings, but not where JR is concerned.  I loved watching Opal and Palmer react to the news that the sainted Dixie is back, even though I had a moment's concern thinking they might actually write my Palmer off the show!  With these veteran actors, you never know which way they're going to go.  If ever a character could rock the very foundation of Pine Valley by coming back from the dead, it would be Dixie.  I am loving the story of her return (frankly, at this point, I don't care if it's the real Dixie or not), even though I have never liked the character of Dixie.  Drama, I like.  Ripple effect, I like.  Debauchery, I like.  Debaucherous David, I like even more.  Sanctimonious Tad getting knocked on his ass, I like.  Adam trying to convince himself it's not Dixie, I like.  JR being stunned in the deadlights for long enough to take a brief break from bashing on Babe and Jamie, I like.  So yeah, there's enough about this story that I love, even though I don't overall care for the central character.  I do have to say that if this is not the real Dixie, ol' Di is doing a great job of pulling minute details out of her ass one right after another like a string of pearls (yet another mental image I so did not need).

Are there any other stories going on?  Well, none that particularly interest me.  I usually end up choking on a little bit of my own vomit every time any part of the Ryan and Greenlee "Quest For the Sperm" story is on.  It just keeps getting worse and worse every day, culminating with Ryan finally realizing what we've known all along:  He's just an asshole.  Greenlee is a little slower at catching on, but with any luck, she'll figure it out and this dark moment of AMC history will slip back into the annals of history.  Ack poo.

The moments are ticking away until even more of the Santos family slips away.  Anita, Maria and Maddie will be heading out to California to join Hayley and Mateo in that great Santos retreat in the west.  Anita will return and of course, Julia isn't far behind and will actually bring a story with her.  Natalia Cigliuti (Anita) will be back after she has her baby later this month.

In that wondrous world known as the soap penal system, Krystal's 8 year (Was it 8?  Pfft, as if I care) sentence is commuted and she will be walking free soon, able to give out all of the conjugal visits and get all the lipstick she wants.  Trading in her stylish prison duds for leopard skin and day glo, she'll be able to give Dixie a proper run for her money.   She'll fit squarely into the other leg of the Di and Tad triangle.

One of my favorite couples will be re-explored, Brooke and Adam.  Their illicit dalliance a while back was enough to wet the whistle, but now we are going to get another go at it.  Giving Brooke some air time is never a bad thing and giving it to her with Adam is even better.  She's no Mary Smythe by any means, but it's a whole lot of fun in a completely different way.


From the info I am getting at this time, it looks like Evangeline and John might actually come out the winners after all.  It's been neck and neck between Jolie and Jovan for months on end and I, for one, don't care who ends up with whom, I'd just like to see the guy  make up his mind and move on.  With news that David Fumero is revisiting the role of Cris, we may now see why the story was dragging out.  I expect it is going to culminate with Natalie finding out that John knew all along it was Cristian who was shipped off to prison and that being the final blow to their lusty connection.  I'm just talking out of my ass here (another mental image I didn't need) and speculating, but that's where I see it going. 

The character of Paige is definitely being written off, in an "interesting" way.  As it turns out, she and Spencer Truman have a child who is already on canvas.  I was pushing for Adrianna to get passed around the ol' Parent-Go-Round yet again or maybe Matthew could get another DNA test and find out he was a switched baby at the hospital and doesn't belong to the Rappaports OR the Buchanans.  Actually, my money is on ol' Ginger.  She's been making her Shannon-clone self a constant presence and what better way than to wind up the genetic offspring of the new hotness in town?

Kelly and Kevin (my eyes!  my eyes!  aaagggghhh!) will be getting jiggy before long.  We all know how Kevin festers to have women who are his (pretty much any woman who is not his) and now that Kelly has googly eyes for Spencer Truman, she will be damned near irresistible to Kevin of the wandering phallus (yet another mental image...). The only woman Kevin didn't cheat on was Grace and that's because she didn't live long enough for him to catch anyone else's eye.  I guess that's the way to gain Kevin's fidelity:  die.

Pregnant Margaret will be on the scene soon (I think the story was delayed out to allow portrayer Tara Signor time to deliver her own baby and recover), stirring up more trouble for Blair and Todd.  This will be after the Blair-Asa crap all plays out, although Blair will be sure at first that it's Margaret who is trying to kill her.  I've heard that in the end, Margaret will be killed and Todd and Blair will end up raising Todd's baby. 

Bo and Nora are a go later this Summer, but not before Nora has a complete breakdown and Bo comes to her rescue.  You just don't make your way through a homicidal husband who also happens to dig on young guys without taking a knock or two upstairs.


I don't know how much of this is out there on the net yet (I don't go to spoiler sites, myself), but a friend of mine who used to work at GH dropped to me that Georgie's fall was a red herring for the real person close to her who ends up giving Maxie a heart.  I was thinking Frisco, but maybe not...  I'm guessing there's an even better reason than we originally heard why Kristina Wagner passed on the story.

Damn.  I was so hoping it was all going to make sense with Michael's little buddy (who looks suspiciously like the cherubic harbinger of death who tried to talk Skye into jumping off the Wyndemere parapet a while back) being either imaginary or a ghost.  I was voting ghost.  I'd love for her to be the ghost of a little girl who was accidentally killed in a shootout by mobsters or something, preferably with Sonny involved.  Oh the drama of it all!   But it's not to be.  Instead, it's a real little kid with a mommy who isn't very happy with the little girl hanging around with the son of Port Charles' resident crime lord.  Oh for the missed opportunities!

The road to baby bliss is going to be rocky for Courtney and Jax.  It's a shame too, because here they are, married for all of 37 minutes AND THEY DO NOT YET HAVE A BABY!!!!!!!  I mean, how can this be?  Initial attempts at fertilization will not be successful. 

Well, shit.  I was about to tell you that Big Daddy John is going to take a bullet to the back when right here on my TV, Big Daddy John took a bullet to the back.  Snoozing and loozing and all that stuff.  He'll be looking at the world from a wheelchair from a while and he will NOT be happy about it.

I can't wait to see Tracy Q running GH.  She's been shining in her scenes with Coleman and Luke.  Seeing even more of her at her Traciest will be a joy and wow, was that a Colemanpalooza or WHAT?  Sage= Happy  That continues as he and Skye do some plotting and scheming and I'm just pleased as punch. :)~

If you didn't do like I told you and go to www.ghfanclub.com to order your tickets for THE absolute, undisputed GH event, the General Hospital Fan Club Weekend Luncheon, then you might be too late!  The event is officially SOLD OUT and there is a waiting list forming.  Katrina and others from the EOS staff will be on hand to cover the events and report back for the 5th year running.  Be sure and find the girls and say hello!

I wandered over the my friend, Carol Banks Weber's column (which is the only other column I visit) on Soap Zone and was amused to see that I guess there was some hub-bub, a brouhaha, as it were, a FRACAS because some designer got her designer thong in a bunch over the confusing arrangement of the fashion house's name and because some of the dresses were described as "tacky."  She also evidently had a problem with the dresses being referred to as "pink" rather than "coral" and some confusion over what designer created which dress.  After reviewing the dresses on the site, I have to say that if the designers were passing off claim (or blame) for their creations, it was likely akin to a custody battle where each parent says, "No, YOU take the kids."  I voted like a good little internet scout and wow, I've got to say I am impressed both by the amount of dust these folks kicked up and with how Soap Zone webmaster, Jeff Jungblut handled the situation.  His classy, tongue-in-cheek, light-heartedness over whatever occurred (while still offering apologies) put a smile on my face during a really frustrating week.  (Lifting my glass to Jeff, here)

Hmmm.  I just saw that both Carol and I used the phrase "red herring" to describe Georgie in regard to being the heart donor for Maxie.  I swear to Bill Gates (since my computer recently had troubles, he is my new Deity of the Moment) that I had that phrase nicely nailed down in my broke ass computer at the time Carol wrote it.  Great minds and all that...

 This great mind is going to get this posted and settle into my NEW HOT TUB and relax into the Solstice night.  Besides, tonight is the night for Fairies and Magic and Sage has just GOT to be a part of that!

Peace to all of you, my darlings,