December 24, 2003


It was a dark and stormy day... which I love.  It's been raining since last night and the wind has been blowing palm fronds everywhere.  Only in my beloved California do you get palm fronds hanging in your evergreens.  I just love it.

(Holy Shit, I just realized that James Farrintino is George Clooney's dad on ER)

Anyway, it's raining in that weird way that's not huge ploppy things, but is still omnipresent and very, very dampening.  One of Delena's friends just got here after biking the 10 minutes or so from her house and she looked like a little drowned kitten.  Speaking of kittens, the cat (who's 12) keeps going to the door and asking to be let out (she doesn't use a litter box, she's housebroken), then shying away when the wind comes through the open door ("fuck this!").  I finally just got her to go out.  Her food is out on the front porch (so the outside kitties in the neighborhood can eat too if they get hungry), so that was another motivation.  If she wants to get anything in or anything out, she has to go outside.  The exception is her water, which she usually gets from the fountain on the entertainment center.  Since I moved the fountain for Christmas decorations, she's completely confused, so I had to put a bowl of water for her where the fountain used to be.  Bless her, she's old.  It's amazing how lithe and vital she is for such an old kitty.  I think it's her blazing addiction to harvested catnip that keeps her young.  If she finds the bag left down, (we buy it by the ounce for her), she'll chew it open and go quite mad.  We put it in the carpet for her to find and on the couch.  The picture on the right is her "after catnip" stance.  We got the couch on the left from the mother of my friend, Georgia.  For whatever reason, from the time we brought it in a couple of months ago, KC (short for Kitty Cat), decided it was HER sofa and occasionally, she lets us sit on it.  She's very possessive of it and can usually be found there (or in the shelf of clean towels, her summer home) when she's not taking her outdoor trips of necessity.  She's been such a good kitty.  She doesn't give a crap about me.  I once ran out of the dry cat food that is her staple food and gave her a can of canned food on the counter by the turtles.  From then on, she decided it was her right to have a can of food every day and she'll sit on that counter and wait for it.  I don't have the heart to turn her down.  Some days, we're out and as soon as I tell her, "Sorry KC, we're out today," she'll shrug and hop down.  I wub her.

I've decided to not do any major cleaning until after January 1st.  I'll clean, straighten, do necessary dishes and laundry, but I'm on Christmas strike for a bit.  Eric and I plan to spend the day watching Sopranos, eating ice cream and hiding in our room.  The kids are really good and play independently, so we'll hear from them if they need something.  They're still heavily involved with their Solstice gifts.  We don't really have plans until Friday night, when we'll go out to eat and try to elbow our way through Toys R Us to use the gift cards Eric's sister sent to the kids.  It will be good to have time alone with him. 

I just went into the garage for something and it was great to hear the rain on the roof.  It reminded me of when Paul (husband #1 and #2) and I lived on Guam (1978-1981). We had a little house out in the jungle of Yigo and the roof was made of tin.  Since it rained a good bit there (it's tropical, so there's the wet season and the wetter season with temperatures between 77-88 degrees year round and 24 hours a day), we could almost always hear the rain pittering or pounding on the tin roof as we slept.  It was wonderful.  I've always loved rain, especially thunderstorms.  We rarely get them much here because we're so close to the Pacific Coast.  One of the things I love most about Sacramento is that it almost never snows, but it rains very nearly all winter off and on.  For the weather alone, I'd never leave this area.  Snow is very magical and pretty, but I hate going out in it and I really hate ice and slush and the cold.  I've never enjoyed going out to play in the snow with the kids and always left that to the dads.  I'm thinking of seeing if Eric wants to take the current kids up to the snow to play.  We've not done that yet.  They saw snow in 2000 (Nathan was only 1) when we went to Canada to Joe and Sandra's wedding, so they're about due again.  I'll bite the bullet and go, but I'll be the one who sits in the car and reads while dolling out the hot cocoa.  It's just not my gig.  I cross myself whenever I hear you folks talking about "x" inches of snow in "x" amount of time.  *shudder* 

Today feels very blessed.  I know it's the energy of all those out there who are preparing for the joy of others and eagerly waiting for tomorrow to come.  I know the basic thread is frustration and tension, but I'm not feeling that at all, which is odd since we're in a Mercury retrograde (maybe that's why... everything backwards of what it should be).  I'm feeling an incredible sense of hope, love, joy, impending miracles, sharing and immense happiness.  It's so strong today for some reason.  I want to wrap it around me like a blanket and snuggle into it.  I'm so blessed and part of that is because there are people like you who care, who come here to read my rambling thoughts and catch up with current events.  On the days when I don't reach out and find you folks, my life feels a little emptier.  I'm so glad you're there and I'm so grateful that the Universe has guided you to click into my little cyber world.

Enjoy your holiday, all those who celebrate tomorrow.  Be blessed and know that my fondest prayers are with you.  Thank you for all of the Solstice well wishes you folks sent my way.  The inherent goodness in you just taking the time to think kindly of us is appreciated more than you know. We really believe that this very thing is what has kept us going while Eric has been laid off (since June!).  The bit jobs come up just when we need them and so far, every time we put a foot down in the water, a stepping stone rises up to meet us.  You folks give so much to us in the way of love and support.  We are so very, very blessed.  Thank you.

Take care and have an absolutely STELLAR holiday!