December 19, 2003
Yayyyy!! Today is my kids' last
day of school this year! They'll be home any minute and then it's two
weeks of kicking back. I really enjoy having my kids at home. We all
get to sleep in a bit, no schedules, lots of cuddles, everything is suddenly on
remote control ("Bring Mama the phone." "Go get Mama a Diet Coke."
"Get your brother a glass of milk."). Since they open presents this
Sunday, they'll be happy and busy and it's going to be great!
Eric is only has one small job to do
today, so I can take the afternoon and go to the thrift shop to fill in a few
holes in the Christmas picture, so to speak. Ahh. Alone time.
It's like the White Buffalo Baby: so rare and so very sacred and pretty
much a miracle. Delena has a Girl Scout Christmas party tonight for
which I have to make 2 dozen cookies. I was going to buy them, but Eric
gave me Bad Mom look, so I'm obligated. Before we take her there, we are
gong to drive the kids around to look at the lights and decorations that are up.
Right now, I've got a headache, but going to bed isn't really an option.
This webset reminded me of a few nights
ago when Delena and I were sitting together on the cuddly, overstuffed sofa in
the family room, looking at the Christmas tree.
This is the sweet angel that adorns the
top of our tree. I pulled Delena closer and told her the story of how she
You see, Santa was having a really bad
day. He woke up with a headache because he didn't have time to get his
optical prescription changed before the holiday rush hit. The brandied
eggnog he had before bed wasn't helping. As he was sitting down to
breakfast, Melfin, the foreman of the Train, Car and Moving Vehicle division,
knocked on the door in a panic. There was an "Elf In" being staged at the
main warehouse and nearly 3/4 of the Elf staff was holed up WITH the toy supply,
refusing to work until the hot cocoa supply was changed from Swiss Miss to
Stephens Gourmet. The cost of the upgrade would be crippling, considering
how much the little pointy-eared suckers slurped up, especially during rush
season. Santa put his fork down and gave the Breakfast That Would Not Be
Eaten a cursory glance before hurling his napkin into his plate and going to his
computer to pull up the database for children's letters. "404 error:
You are not authorized to view this file." "Wha?" He tried again.
Same thing. He tried to access the Good Kid/Bad Kid files. Same
thing. He reached over to dial up the Pixie Pixels and was put on hold
after being informed by a high pitched, recorded voice that his call was very
important to them.
As he was waiting, Mrs. Clause came in
and told him she needed the computer for Everquest. He told her he would
be finished in a minute and she crossed her arms over her ample bosom and stood
about four inches from him, waiting... waiting. She started tapping
her foot. "How much longer?" The recorded voice urged him to stay on
the line, that his call was important. He got a beep and gambled to take
it. Melfin again. The striking elves were threatening to start
burning the toys. He said he'd be right there. Clicked back to the
Pixel Pixies. A dial tone. He'd missed the call. He slammed
down the receiver.
"Are you finished yet?" taptaptap
He tried to access the files again. Still not authorized. "Um,
"The files aren't coming up."
"The FILES, you know, good kids, bad
kids, 'Bring me this for Christmas.' THE FILES."
"The files are gone?"
"I don't know if they're gone, but
they're not coming up."
"Did you back up the files on CD rom?"
*pause* "No... not in a week.
No, I indeed did not."
"You should have backed them up.
Then you could pull them up from disk."
"Well, yes, then I could. That's
"So you're telling me you don't have
any idea what each kid wants, where they live, who should be getting what or
anything?" Her voice grew more shrill with every word, it seemed and
by the time she got to the "anything," it was nearly supersonic.
"No, I don't."
"Well, Kris, I think it's safe to say,
"No, I'm not, it'll work out."
"Maybe, maybe not. But right now,
IT'S ALMOST CHRISTMAS, YOU HAVE NO LISTS, NO INFORMATION, NO ELVES WORKING
EXCEPT THE SCAB ELVES AND DAMMIT, I STILL WANT TO PLAY EVERQUEST AND YOU'RE
STANDING HERE FLAPPING YOUR JAWS INSTEAD OF DOING ANYTHING ABOUT ANY OF THAT!"
Santa cut her a look and headed for the
door, grabbing his red coat. He slipped it on and tried to buckle it, only
to find it no longer reached around his belly. He struggled and inhaled
and pulled as Mrs Claus' voice tinkled in from the office, "Dryer shrinking
things again, Rotundo Claus?"
Another knock at the door. A
little angel there smiled brightly and said, "Where would you like for me to
stick the tree, Santa"?
And that's how the poor little angel
got the tree up her butt.
Fortunately, Delena laughed a good deal
and it was "our moment."
I bought myself a Christmas gift.
I was ordering some things on a charge account that I have and swore I'd never
touch and I came across this monkey vase. At first, I thought it would
make a great chalice, but it turns out to be HUGE and also, the inside is very
shallow, like a small bowl instead of going deep into the vase it's actually
supposed to be. Trying to decide what to do with it. I could put
sand in it and let it be a smudge bowl (we use bunches of sage, cedar,
sweetgrass and such tied together like this:
because the properties of those herbs
are very cleansing and purifying. You tie the stuff together (I actually
prefer sagebrush, but white sage will work as well), light the end, blow it out
like incense, the take it through the house (or over You) to clear the air and
dissipate negative crap. It is great for cleaning bad nasties out of
houses, like anger, frustration, fear, etc. Anyway, the smudge bowl is
where you put the smudge stick down when you aren't waving it around into the
corners of the room (where stuff collects).
I could also put some florist foam
green stuff in it and poke incense or flower in it. I'm still deliberating
on the ways the monkey will be used.
While we're looking at cool things,
here are some wonderful gifts I've gotten lately:
This is the Dapper Dan ("I don't want
FOP, goddammit, I'm a DAPPER DAN MAN!") clock from my favorite movie of all
time, "O Brother, Where Art Thou?" That was from my friend, Sherry
Mercurio. *sigh* I love it.
This pretty little angel is a gift from
my friend, Kathy Hardeman. Her skirt is decorated with flowers and
greenery and the bottom says, "I'll always care." *sniff* Me too,
honey. In the background, you can see the beautiful Protector statue my
friend, Maurine, sent me earlier this year and pretty little floral pig my sweet
Patricia sent to me last year. Patricia was one of those net friends that
you adore and who just *disappears* one day without a trace. I really miss
her a lot.
Anyway, thanks to everyone who has sent
me these lovely things. They are a tangible reminder that there are people
out there who care about me and that means the world to me. With my dad
long dead and this being the first Christmas without my mom, I've been feeling a
bit teary lately, even though I do have my beautiful children and wonderful
husband around me. I will be grateful in a way when I can think about Mom
without tearing up. It still hurts so much and it's been almost a year
(hard to believe). It still leaves me breathless to think about her being
gone and I can't seem to shake it. The bottom of my stomach seems to drop
out and I'm dribbling before the thought is even complete. I've got to
snap it together.
I do have to admit that the freedom of
crying is one of the glories of age. A good purge can do wonders to clear
the system. Amazing how values change as one gets older: a good cry,
a good hug, a good bowel movement, good food, good sex, good music, a good
movie, good friends... all are just so much more satisfying after 40, especially
when all of the above can often be in short supply. When they're there, it
makes it all the more precious.
I also found a couple of funnies for
Click here: http://members.cox.net/impunity/endofworld.swf
I can see where they would be confused.
Latin, incense, robes, chanting, candles...
I'm sure the Catholics are much more offended
than the Pagans. We got no grief with them. :)
With that, I'm going to say goodbye for the weekend.
The next time you hear from me, Christmas/Solstice will likely already be in my
rear view window!
Take care and have a STELLAR weekend!