July 29, 2004

...and I'm still alive.  :)

I've been working with the lessons of this week.  Part of me is warring with the idea that I'm spending too much time on the computer and that my values are askew in that respect.  Part of me thinks I have a web host that is a bit clumsy and evidently, not very responsive since they have not yet written back to me and it's been two days.  After restoring 29 columns (some were archives) to Eye on Soaps, I got up in the night and recreated another 16 pages on The Diva Digest.  Went back to sleep around 3:30am, dozing on the couch.  I was surprised that after half an hour, it was already starting to get light in the house.

Our harvest has been amazing.  Eric was assigned to oversee a major project today after only two weeks on the job.  He has another project lined up after that, so there's good job security there.  The pay is not what the potential was with his own company, but it's consistent, weekly and he doesn't have to wrestle people to the ground for half of what he's supposed to get.  Slowly but surely, we're coming up out of the darkness and getting bills caught up.   That feels really good.  As much as he wanted to be a part of his own company, I'm grateful that Eric was able to shift gears and go in this direction.  (*whew*)  I can't believe he drives a couple hundred miles a day just to have this job...and likes it.  It's hard not seeing him as much as I used to and he's had his crab moments, but I think we're working out the glitches and I'm starting to adjust to the changes.

I was having trouble contacting the school district (being summer and all) to set up home schooling for Dylan, so I called his school (no answer), then Delena's school, just to verify with them that I was calling the right number.  I talked to the secretary who happened to be there and she told me that she would "look into it" and give me a call back.  I figured "sure," thanked her and resolved to deal with it closer to time, even into the first week of school if need be. 

I forgot where I live.

This woman, who, remember, isn't even dealing with a student from her school, called me back to tell me that a teacher at Dylan's school was willing to work with us on the home schooling as more of an independent study program.  I guess they evidently do this a good bit.  So what will happen is that, if I'm understanding correctly, Dylan will still be a student at his old school, but this teacher will provide all of the curriculum, the study plans, etc and we'll pick up and drop off assignments.  She is supposed to call us the week before school starts to work everything out.  I don't have to file paperwork as an independent school. I don't have to do anything other than proctor him through the assignments for the year, then he eases into third grade at the little school.  It was... effortless (so far).  Delena is trilled to be on her own and not have to deal with him on the school bus.  She's been antsy and I know she'll be eager to get on the bus this year.  (Plus, there's that whole "new clothes" thing that comes up).  I've been downplaying with Nathan because I'm nervous about putting him on the bus and don't want it to show.  Even though it's just over 2 weeks away, I'm kind of hoping I have a car by then. I could be mobile!

I'm very excited about this change in my life.  I'm a little antsy about Nathan going, but he's so very eager and I know it will do him a world of good.  The teacher is just outstanding and he's only a mile or so up the road.  Dylan is so totally quiet and independent that I'll hardly know he's here and if I do go out, he travels well.  :)  I can really feel the door closing on a part of my life for the first time in ... well, for the first time.  I guess the last time I felt something this profound was when I quit work to be a stay-at-home mom.  When Josh went to school, I was a full time employee, so I didn't feel the impact other than the rite of passage for him.  I was gone either way.  When Delena went to school, I was working at the preschool, so she was there with me to visit whenever I wanted and again, when she went to first grade, I was working and later had two little ones at home.  This will be the first time in my life that I am, for all intents and purposes, alone.  I am very excited by the idea and have lots of plans.

It's quite mild on the mountain today.  I'm out of diet soda, so I did the righteous thing and didn't ask Eric to get me any, drinking water instead.  Now I just have to motivate myself on the exercise.  (yikes)

I have managed, on e-bay to replace out the toys that were stolen from the kids when we moved (the Fisher Price stuff).  I got the farm animals and such, plus the stuff from the Discovery City.  A friend has said she's sending me the house, so with those three things, their favorites will be replaced.  They lost their wagon and Nathan, his big wheel, but he's already riding his teeny bike without training wheels.  Check this out:

Nathan came to us and asked that his training wheels be removed.  We asked him if he wanted us to raise them or bend them up first, but no, he wanted them off.  Eric removed them, Nathan got on and rode away.  I've never seen that happen in six bike riding kids.  David was really close.  He learned in an afternoon. 

Speaking of bikes, Eric doesn't know it yet, but I plan to get mine this weekend.  : P

The week is going so fast! I can't believe it's already Thursday.  It feels like everything is moving in fast motion.  I want to slow everything down and savor it and truly be in the moment.  There is so very much that I want to do and sometimes, it feels like it's all getting away from me because life is moving so fast.  When I look at the grand scheme of things, I know I have plenty of time left, but I don't want to take that for granted.

I need to get the "every day, every moment is precious" thing down pat because I've been letting too many of them slip away.

Life is here.  Hope is alive and both are very, very good.

I hope you are all doing well and are easing down into a wonderful harvest (and Blue Moon!) weekend like a bubbly, comfy hot tub.  The Blue Moon gives this harvest a "one of a kind" aspect that I'll bet you're all enjoying!  The energy around it is very generous and strong.  I'm excited to be around for it!

Have a brilliant week and I'll be back around on Monday or Tuesday.  Unless something nutty happens that I *have* to tell you, I'm taking creative time off until Monday to breathe and experience and *be*.

There's a WHOLE lot of life out there and friends, I'm gonna go get me some!  (I'll be back with stories!!)

Love to you all,