Feb 11, 2004

I'm sick.

Laws yes, I'm sick.  It's not the most major sick ever, but it's a sick, nonetheless.  I was a little worried when I got sick posting the pictures three nights ago.  I'm not normally given to nausea except when I'm pregnant and I had it for two nights straight at the same time, pretty intensely.  Mind you, I didn't really think I was pregnant, even though my period was late, because I had a tubal ligation 5 years ago in which I requested the severed tube ends be rolled up, cauterized, stomped upon, super glued and a giant stone rolled in front of each one. 

What was bugging me more was that I was getting sick when I usually don't.  Don't know what THAT was about, but it has passed now, so that's great.  Unfortunately, Eric's constant bitching along the lines of "I don't know why I'm the only one who's sick!" paid off and I launched into the most immediate chest and head cold I've ever had descend upon me.  No tickly throat lead in, no slight case of the sniffles, just a bit of tired one day and headlong into hacking, spitting, heavy nose blowing cold the next.  Something I did find was Chloraseptic Sore Throat Relief Strips, which are like breath freshening strips that melt instantly in your mouth, except this is Chloraseptic and coats your throat instantly.  Great stuff.  I never had much luck aiming that damned spray and discreet, it's not.  The strips were on sale for $3 for 40 strips.

Eric let me hang in bed most of yesterday after the kids were out the door, made me soup, the whole bit.  I got up around 4 and made some Tuna Helper Creamy Pasta for everyone for dinner, which for me is absolutely the most incredible nurture food ever and is totally off my diet.  THCP and chicken cooked with macaroni are the absolutely consummate cuddle food.  Feeling all full and warm and nurtured, I watched something... What About Bob, that was it, something I can't recall that accidentally got over into Star Trek time (yikes!), then part of a Marc Maron stand up comedy bit (terrible, actually), then Scrubs, then I got intrigued by a show on conjoined twins on the Discovery channel.

Scrubs was interesting because it was the episode on which Michael J Fox guest starred. I'm so glad he's still working despite the Parkinson's and they did a really good job of doing quick back and forth camera shots, keeping his hands in pockets or busy or very animated.  He still still such a wonderful actor. 

The conjoined twins things was very interesting, following one couple through a pregnancy in which they learned they had twins joined at the heart.  They kept a very positive approach and attitude, never ceasing to learn more and more the entire pregnancy.  The show ended with the twins being born, living for 30 minutes, over which time, they slowly died.  It was extremely depressing.  :(

Yesterday, at some point when I was in bed, Eric came in and said the internet wasn't working.  Turns out our cable was turned off for nonpayment.   I didn't even get a warning notice.  >:<  Sent them some money and got my TV and internet back in just a few minutes.  I called tech support to be sure that's what it was because my TV was still on for about 20 minutes after the internet went out.  The tech guy clarified that I was a bum who hadn't paid my bill, so he gave me another number to call and I waited on hold for 40 minutes listening to this hellish Little Rascals music.  The recording would pop in every 10 seconds (literally) to remind me that all of their operators were busy helping other customers and that they'd be with me shortly.  When the recording would come on, it made a human fumbling sound that made it seem like an operator was actually picking up.  Finally, Eric called the number for his cell phone and got through almost immediately while I was still on hold.  >:<  Payment was made, service restored and joy and happiness ruled throughout the land, except in my bank account.

I kept Eric awake all night, hacking and coughing, and then Nathan joined in the chorus at some point.  Then I learned that TODAY is the field trip that Eric promised to go on with Dylan, so the poor guy had to get up at 8am to hurry off to the school after getting about 4-5 hours of sleep.  He gets the Dad of the Year award.  He puts up a lot to sleep beside me.  I suggested he go to the couch (I have to be by the alarm to get up and get kids to school) so he could have some quiet, but he declined. 

My house is in desperate need of cleaning.  Eric has been handling that for a few days for the most part and I'm just whipped.   Got to try and get some energy going soon.

I was thinking of this post:  http://eyeonsoaps.com/nonsoapy052003.htm  Could give both me and Eric a break. :)  While looking through the archives for this, I was surprised by how many "I'm so depressed!" posts I used to do, back in 2002 and even into last year.  I am so grateful to not be in that place any more and for those kinds of posts to be a few months apart now instead of a few weeks.  It just goes to show how getting better is a process and not an overnight thing.  I guess that applies to a lot of things.  Even with the financial challenges, I love my life now and I'm grateful for every single moment of it.  I'm also grateful for every owie step that got me here.


Now for the funnies...

I loved this.  It's for Georgia:


An actual letter of resignation from an employee of Zantex Computers, USA, to her boss (who apparently resigned very soon afterwards).....

Dear Mr. Baker,

As an employee of an institution of higher education, I have a few very basic expectations. Chief among these is that my direct superiors have an intellect that ranges above the common ground squirrel. After your consistent and annoying harassment of my co-workers and myself during the commission of our duties, I can only surmise that you are one of the few genetic wastes of our time.

Asking me, a network administrator, to explain every nuance of everything I do each time you happen to stroll into my office is not only a waste of time but also a waste of precious oxygen. I was hired because I know how to network computer systems and you were apparently hired to provide amusement to myself and other employees, who watch you vainly attempt to understand the concept of "cut and paste" for the hundredth time. You will never understand computers. Something as incredibly simple as binary still gives you too many options. You will also never understand why people hate you but I am going to try and explain it to you, even though I am sure this will be just as effective as telling you what an IP is. Your shiny new iMac has more personality than you ever will.

You walk around the building all day, shiftlessly looking for fault in others. You have a sharp-dressed useless look about you that may have worked for your interview, but now that you actually have responsibility, you pawn it off on overworked staff, hoping their talent will cover for your glaring ineptitude. In a world of managerial evolution, you are the green-blue algae that everyone else eats and laughs at. Managers like you are sad proof of the Dilbert principle. Seeing as this situation is unlikely to change without you getting a full frontal lobotomy I am forced to tender my resignation, however I have a few parting thoughts.

1) When someone calls you in reference to employment, it is illegal for you to give me a bad recommendation. The most you can say to hurt me is "I prefer not to comment". I will have friends randomly call you over the next couple of years to keep you honest, because I know you will be unable to do it on your own.

2) I have all the passwords to every account in the system and I know every password that you have used for the past five years. If you decide to get cute, I am going to publish your "favorites list", which I conveniently saved when you made me back up your useless files. I do believe that terms like "Lolita" are not usually viewed favorably by the administration.

3) When you borrowed the digital camera to "take pictures of your Mother's birthday", you neglected to mention that you were going to take pictures of yourself in the mirror nude. Then you forgot to erase them like the techno-moron you really are. Suffice it to say I have never seen such odd acts with a sauce bottle, but I assure you that those have been copied and kept in safe places pending the authoring of a glowing letter of recommendation. (Try to use a spell check please, as I hate having to correct your mistakes).

Thank-you for your time and I expect the letter of recommendation on my desk by 8:00 a.m. tomorrow. One word of this to anybody, and all of your little twisted repugnant obsessions will be open to the public. Never f*** with your systems administrator. Why? Because they know what you do with all
that free time!

Wishing you a grand and glorious day,



Dear Dog(s) and/or Cat(s), 

1. When I say to move, it means go someplace else, not switch positions with each other so there are still two of you in the way.

2. The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. (Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate & food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food & dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.)

3. The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the  object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.

4. I cannot buy anything bigger than a king size bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue to sleep on the couch to ensure your comfort. Look at videos of dogs and cats sleeping. They can actually curl up in a ball. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. (I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space used is nothing but sarcasm.)

5. My compact discs are not miniature Frisbees.

6. For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob, or get your paw under the  edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. (In addition, I have been using the bathroom for years...canine or feline attendance is not mandatory.)

7. The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog's or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough. It would be such a simple change for you.

8. To pacify you I have posted the following message on our front door:

Rules for Non-pet owners who visit and like to complain about our pets:

They live here; you don't.

If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture.

I like my pet better than I like most people.

To you it's an animal. To me he and/or she is an adopted son and/or daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and is speech challenged.

Dogs and cats are better than kids. They eat less, don't ask for money all the time, are easier to train, usually come when called, never drive your car, don't hang out with drug using friends, don't drink or smoke, don't worry about buying the latest fashions, don't wear your clothes, don't need a gazillion dollars for college, and if they get pregnant, you can sell the results.


Click on these to make them bigger:


and with that, I'm outta here.  Have a great rest of the week, darlins!