February 5, 2004
100 Things You May
Not Know About Katrina
(Or May Know)
1. I was born in the
basement of the church ministered by my
grandmother. It was a basement apartment in which
2. I was born at exactly
12:00 noon EST. The noon whistle blew as my body
slid out of my mom's.
3. I have six children,
five boys, one girl. There is a ten year gap
between each set of three.
4. I am a licensed minister
and can perform legal weddings, etc.
5. I have held many
professions in my life, including librarian, every
restaurant position you could hold, Lamaze
childbirth instructor, medical front office work,
medical transcriptionist, preschool administrator,
police data entry (I did input on the tickets and
incident reports), telephone operator and
environmental protection assistant. I started
working when I was 16 and “retired” at 37.
6. My husband and I took a
bankruptcy to enable me to be a stay at home mom
after my favorite cousin’s daughter died of
leukemia at 12. She was a stay at home mom and
when Natalie died, I thought about all she would
have missed if she’d worked. I quit my job the
next week and since then, we’ve gone through a lot
to keep it that way, but never once regretted it.
7. My husband is 15 years
younger than I am. We got married on his birthday
so he would be old enough to gamble in Reno.
8. My first husband and I
married in 1978, divorced in 1991, remarried in
1994 and our second divorce was final in 1996.
9. My daughter was named
for my favorite cousin, mentioned in #6.
10. My first son, Joe,
named my third son, Josh. We didn’t have a boy’s
name and Joe was reading a story with a character
named “Joshua” in it and suggested the name. He
was four at the time (Joe, not Josh).
11. Only my first two
children were born in hospitals. Josh, Dylan and
Nathan were born at home and Delena was born in a
free standing birthing center.
12. At age 41, I became the
oldest in my line of family. Both of my parents
and all of my grandparents have died.
13. My first son was born
when I was sixteen and it was the best thing that
ever happened to me.
14. Both Delena and Nathan
completely lost heart tones during birth and had
to be aggressively resuscitated afterwards.
15. After a great deal of
exhaustive letter writing, researching,
interviewing and fact-finding, in 1992, I decided
not to vaccinate my children. This was not a
decision arrived at lightly and was done prior to
having the internet, so it was done the old
fashioned way… snail mail. I compared reported
instances of the contraction of the diseases “in
the wild” and typical results of the diseases
versus the instances of complications from
vaccines and charted out a twenty year trend based
on info provided by the American Medical Academy,
the Atlanta Center of Disease control and the
American Academy of Pediatrics, among others. None
of my last three children are vaccinated.
16. I am adamantly against
the circumcision of babies. Again, this comes
after aggressive research on the subject. Only
one of my sons is circumcised and that was because
I stupidly caved to the wishes of my husband (it
didn’t happen again).
17. I was a devout
Christian until 1978, then became an Atheist,
which didn’t work for me at all. I was very
excited and had a feeling of “coming home” when I
learned about Wicca and Witchcraft in 1984. I
have been a practicing Witch since 1986. I’m
very, very good at it and the path is very
spiritually uplifting for me.
18. My older three sons are
all musically gifted and I am definitely not in
19. I literally sobbed when
Mr. Rogers died and when my friend, Sage, went
20. As a military wife, I
lived at bases on Guam, in England, in New Mexico,
in Idaho and in Southern California. I now live
in Sacramento, California and it’s my favorite
place to live in the world.
21. I never touched a
computer until 1997 and had no idea how to set up
a web page when Eye on Soaps was born in 2000. My
son, Joe, gave me a crash course in Paint Shop Pro
and Front Page and helped me set up the main
shell. The rest emerged over a month of 22 hour
days and computer monitor-induced blindness.
22. My son, Joe, lives in
Victoria, British Columbia and has duel
citizenship due to his marriage to Sandra, who is
23. I have never seen “Old
Yeller,” “The Color Purple” or several other
movies because I refuse to watch a movie that is
specifically set up to make me cry.
24. I won’t have a pet
whose ass I can’t kick in a fight.
25. The only condiments I
ever eat are salt, pepper and butter. No ketchup,
mustard, mayo, relish, etc. Occasionally, I will
eat light BBQ sauce.
26. I don’t like things
that are a spoiled something else: no buttermilk,
sour cream, cottage cheese, yogurt, etc. I only
like cheese when it’s cooked, such as lasagna,
pizza, potato skins and such. That makes Atkins a
real bitch for me.
27. When I got married the
first time, my mother and I took the artificial
flowers from a local graveyard, kept track of the
graves they were on, decorated the church, then
later returned the flowers to their rightful
28. When I married my first
husband the second time, I wore black since white
hadn’t gotten me anywhere the first time. I
should have changed husbands, not clothes.
29. When I was 13, I really
believed that a peace sign was a “broken cross”
and an anti-Christ symbol rather than the Germanic
rune of protection that it is.
30. When I got married in
1978, I was terrified of people who drank. My
mother and father convinced me that people who
drink beat their wives and people who smoke, die
of lung cancer.
31. I smoked for two years,
then quit. I wasn’t very good at it.
32. I am an avid supporter
of the nationwide legalization of medical
marijuana. Based on my own extensive research and
experience, I believe that marijuana should be
legalized and alcohol should be a controlled
33. I watch Star Trek,
The Next Generation reruns around 5 nights a
34. I went for three years
without watching prime time.
35. I don’t ever watch the
news unless there’s an election.
36. I was not registered to
vote until Arnold ran for Governor of California
because since I turned 18, no one has ever run for
office who I had any interest whatsoever in
supporting. I’d rather not vote than participate
in voting the wrong guy into office.
37. I’ve never served jury
duty because every time I’ve been asked, I’ve had
very small children at home and it was
impossible. I will some day, however.
38. My youngest son has no
middle name. David’s middle name is “Uriah” after
my ex’s grandfather. Delena has two middle names,
“Alexis” and “Katherine” because I couldn’t
39. My middle name is
40. My first name came from
my father mishearing the name of a ballerina named
Katina Valiente (or something like that). My
mother wanted to name me Lydia Jane.
41. My father was in the
same Army hospital in Germany as Elvis Presley.
42. My grandfather could
not say “Katrina” and from my birth until 1994, I
was called “Kathy.” Several people from my
hometown still call me Kathy.
43. My maiden name was
Chapman and my grandfather was a direct descendent
of the brother of John Chapman, the real Johnny
44. On a flight from
Louisville to Dallas to San Francisco in 1978 I
sat next to Mike Farrell from MASH (in coach, no
45. I have never flown
anywhere first class, but plan to do that some
46. Once, on Guam, we
couldn’t get a good parking place on July 4th
to watch the fireworks over the bay, so we crept
stealthily onto the back lawn of the governor’s
mansion, smoked pot, ate oatmeal cookies and had a
47. I went through a period
of time in 1989 of compulsive shoplifting. I was
never caught, but had a moment of clarity and
swore off it forever, turning to compulsive eating
48. I don’t like pastries,
pancakes or doughnuts that aren’t Krispy Kreme.
49. When I was pregnant
with Joe, I would get sick from things I saw on
TV, like KFC commercials. I didn’t even have to
smell it, just see it.
50. My mother couldn’t
stand food smells when she was pregnant with
Allen, my younger brother, and told me that toast
and applesauce were what Jesus ate for breakfast.
She could feed me those things without smelling
anything that made her sick and I ate it
voraciously given the Jesus connection. She
craved strawberry ice cream with cherry tomatoes
mixed in it.
51. When I was a little
girl, I was sexually abused by my dentist, which
is why I have a horrible aversion to dentistry as
52. My family raised
chickens when I was growing up and my taunting
name at school was “chicken farmer.” I never
could bring myself to kill them, but I’ve dressed
more chickens than I’ve ever wanted to remember
(and I don’t mean dressed them in tuxes).
53. My first little girl
crush was Gomer Pyle. He was just so niiice.
54. I was a David Cassidy
girl, not a Donnie Osmond girl.
55. I could never turn
cartwheels, do round-offs or any other flipping
upside down activity. It just didn’t happen
despite hours and hours of backyard hours logged
56. I have an absolutely
irrational, blinding terror of snakes.
57. I have been to Hawaii
four times. I like Hawaii. All four times were
military flights between Guam and San Francisco.
58. I graduated from High
School a year early via GED. I have a huge number
of college credits, but nothing that can combine
into a degree because I only took classes that
59. I can’t swim or roller
skate, despite a million boyfriends insisting they
could teach me.
60. I am an excellent
cook. I mean really, really excellent.
61. I once had an article
on why our mothers’ generation had difficulty
breastfeeding that was published by Parent’s
62. Five of my six babies
have slept with me until they were a year old,
some longer. All went easily into their own beds
when it was time.
63. I have very, very
little body hair and only have to shave my legs
and pits about once a week.
64. I have spent many hours
sleeping on the back of a motorcycle. I’ve slept
standing up before. I love sleep, but being a
single parent has spoiled that for me and I can’t
seem to get back into the groove of really deep
65. I once went two months
without swearing just to see if I could. Then I
missed it (a lot) and resumed. I learned from the
experience that while rampant swearing is crass,
one must not discriminate against words as all
have their inherent value.
66. My grandmother-in-law
lives in the same condo complex as Oscar de la
67. People who are afraid
of balloons scare me a little.
68. In a Burger King with
Delena last year, I saw a man screaming at his own
reflection in the back of a CD.
69. I go through 4-5
candles a week.
70. My favorite incenses
are “Dragon Cloud” by Airs and “Campfire Jam” by
Grateful Dead Incense.
71. Religious intolerance
and any form of child abuse/neglect (including the
way people speak to their children) are the two
things that piss me off more than anything.
72. I absolutely love TV
and have a precise schedule that runs from 7am
73. I love several
different kinds of music, but gravitate mostly to
classic rock, country (I know almost no country
that is recent) and new agey stuff.
74. I was 25 before I ever
went on a roller coaster, despite many visits to
theme parks that had him.
75. It really pisses me off
to hear loud music coming out of cars. If I am in
my car, I shouldn’t be able to hear the music from
the car next to me louder than I can hear my own
76. I started an
apprenticeship as a midwife in 1982, but had to
leave the program when my ex got orders to
77. Out of three weddings
and six children, I’ve only ever had 3 showers.
One was a baby shower given by my cousins, one was
a baby shower given by my coworkers at the
preschool and one was a baby shower that, oddly,
my mother-in-law brought with her from New Jersey
after Nathan was born.
78. I’ve only had one
birthday party in my adult life, one put on by my
beautiful coven in 2002. I couldn’t stop crying
the whole time.
79. I would not have been
able to attend my mother’s funeral without the
help of the EOS readers who came together to make
80. When I was a newborn,
my parents were at an auction and a woman there
offered to buy me for $10,000.
81. I am the only member of
my birth family (mom, dad, 2 brothers) who has
never weighed over 300 pounds).
82. Because of my basic
lack of affinity for animals, I was at a deadlock
when asked what my totem animal was, so I deemed
it to be George Clooney. I figure he visits me in
dream time and vision time and our spirits soar
together. He represents strength, wisdom, a glint
of God in his eye and a definite animal presence.
He's mine. I've claimed him in the name of the
Goddess as my totem animal. Plus, I think I could
take him in a fight.
83. I am very challenged in
the raising of houseplants. I’ve killed all but
one struggling little pothos and a (for reasons
unknown) thriving umbrella plant that keeps
outgrowing its pot. Everything else dies.
84. I can’t say the word
“Chernobyl” without first thinking hard about it
and working syllable by syllable. If I just try
and say it outright, it always comes out “Cherbonyl.”
85. By my second year of
living in England I had developed a British accent
so strong it took me six months of American living
to lose it and get my southern accent back.
86. While in England
(1982-85), I became quite an ace at darts. I
never had to buy drinks at the pub because I would
win them all in games of darts. I was even on the
pub dart league.
87. I have two tattoos: a
butterfly on top of my left wrist and another
butterfly on my left boob.
88. In the mid-late 1980’s,
my ex and I were in a motorcycle club called “The
Roadmasters.” I was one of only two female
members in the history of the group and my
nickname was “Tits.” >:<
89. I have read Tarot cards
for 18 years, have written one book on the subject
and I’m really, really good at it.
90. I hate malls and only
go in them under the most dire of circumstances
(or to attend a movie because sadly, my favorite
theater is in the Sunrise Mall).
91. From 1991 – 2000, I
lived in 12 different homes, 6 from 91-94 and 6
92. I literally have
hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of books,
probably well over a thousand. I have a passion
for books that is unbelievable.
93. Although purely
speculative, I am 99.5% sure that if I were
really, really rich, I would still shop at thrift
shops and garage sales, just not exclusively like
94. If I ride backward in
any vehicle, I get sick. I also can never, ever
read while in motion or puking will ensue.
95. My 7th grade
math teacher was arrested for kidnapping himself.
here bottom entry)
96. I have seen every
episode of “Dynasty” and “Dallas,” even the
horrible last few episodes of Dynasty.
97. I hate reality shows
(so I hold a grim outlook for my TV future), but
did enjoy “The Joe Schmo Show.” Go figure. I’ve
never watched “Survivor,” “Big Brother,” “The
Bachelor” or any of the others. I did watch a
couple of episodes of “Surreal World” by
98. When my children are
older, I plan to aggressively begin a professional
writing career. Before then, I can’t commit into
deadlines. I can barely get my writing done for
the site (and lord knows thedivadigest.com needs
updating) and with that, I have the luxury of
putting it off if needed.
99. After 6 years of
marriage, I am still absolutely batshit,
starry-eyed, leaping heart stupid in love with my
husband. Even on our worst day of arguing, I’d
still marry him again.
100. I am amazingly,
stunningly proud of each of my children in very
different ways and they keep me in awe every