Comments through July 23, 2004 
(Iím a spoilamockaholic.  How about you?) 

Have you ever wondered how it feels to skateboard off a curb and land with perfect balance?  How about skiing?  Ever tried to imagine skiing gracefully off a ledge, sailing through the air and landing upright on a soft pillow of snow and swooshing down the mountain?  Does the thought of skydiving intrigue you?  All these activities are the physical equivalent to what we vicariously experience watching soaps.  There are lots of activities that Iíll never attempt but that doesnít mean I donít try to imagine what it feels like to experience them.  On a soap characters plot, plan, and mark a course that most of us wouldnít dream of in real life.  But isnít it nice to watch, absorb and imagine ourselves in a soapy characterís situation for a short while?  Soap characters rarely eat, clean up or use the bathroom.  Iím trying to imagine that right nowÖ 

I want to label Monday, July 19, ďThe Day That Sonny Made SenseĒ.  Sonny returned to the chapel after Lilaís memorial service to find Jason and agonize one more time that he canít keep Carly and his family in one penthouse and Sam and her baby in Jasonís penthouse unless Jason claims paternity.  Finding Jason in the chapel was essential because life revolves around Sonny and his feelings and he wouldnít want to respect Jasonís grief or acknowledge that Jason could feel for anyone but him.  After an eye roll over Sonnyís disrespect towards Jasonís private moment of grief, I liked how the conversation flowed.

Jason, youíve had five whole minutes to grieve.

Not itís all about me again! 

Jason: Do you want it [the marriage] to be real?  Thatís what you have to figure out.  Sonny, do you want to be married to Carly or do you want to tell the truth so she leaves and youíre free to go back to Sam?  What?

Sonny:  Sam and I were together for about a month and a half.  Long enough to enjoy each otherís company, long enough to make a baby, long enough for her to fall in love.  The truth is sheís a great woman, I care about her, but Iím not in love with her.  I couldnít because my family was there.  And I think they always will beÖ.I want Carly as my wife, not my roommate.  I want to be able to sleep with her.  I want to be able to trust her and I want her to be able to trust me.  If I tell her the truth and she leaves, at least itís resolved.  And if she stays, at least I know that she did it knowingly with her eyes open, because she wanted toÖ.I want a real marriage or I donít want a marriage. 

Way to go, Sonny!  It was way past time for him to define his wants.  Of course, since Jason left with Danny on Monday the rest of the week could be called ďSonny Trashes His Life Because Jason Isnít Around to Stop HimĒ which is what he always does when left to his own devices for a couple days.  Itís so hard to keep track ofÖwhat promise is Sonny honoring now by being honest with Carly?  His promise to God to keep his family together?  His promise to Jason and Michael to place Michaelís well being above his own?  One of his many promises to Carly to love, honor and respect her?  Oh well, it was a dumb paternity secret in the first place and should have been told months ago. 

Donít send me hateful e-mails because this needs to be said.  Has it occurred to anyone else that Carly has become Robin in the Carly/Sonny/Sam triangle?  Carly accuses Sam (unfairly most of the time) of trying to steal Sonny because she assumes that Sam is working the same agenda Carly used when she pursued Jason.  Carly deliberately trashed Jasonís relationship with Robin because she wanted him and she had no problem using Jasonís love of Michael to tip the scales in her favor.  Sam may not be actively pursuing Sonny, but Carly will never believe it because she automatically believes that Sam is trying to manipulate Sonny using her unborn child.  As Carly told Sonny, she feels threatened and under attack and a part of me canít help but mentally shake my head and think, ďWhat goes around, comes around.Ē  Itís not that Iím watching and thinking bad Carly thoughts (well OK, sometimes I think bad Carly thoughts but not always), but I keep hoping that sheíll make the connection, learn the lesson, mature, grow.  You know, the way most of us do in real life when situations hit that make us sit back and take stock.

Iím trying to think of a name for the dance these two perform in a scene.

They have similar mannerisms. 

Sonny declared to Carly with heartfelt honesty, ďYouíre who I love.Ē  A tear spilled down Carlyís cheek.  How do actors do that?  Really.  Itís not like they film scenes in sequence and have the benefit of the emotions from the scene we saw on screen seconds before to work up to the tears.  Have you ever tried to think of something sad to make yourself cry?  Iíve tried just to see if I could and it doesnít work for me.

And one perfectly timed tear drop rolled down her cheek. 

Alexisí has a dilemma.  If she does as Sonny asks and takes Samís case, sheíll be helping to free the woman Carly hates.  After Alexis desperately pleaded for Carlyís understanding regarding Kristina, she might want to keep a low profile and try to stay on Carlyís good side.  She begged Carly, ďYouíre a mother.  Mothers choose their children above anyone else.  Iím begging you, please, please, donít tell him.  Not ever.Ē  I felt her gut deep fear over losing her child.  But if she takes the case and wins, freeing Sonnyís former lover and the mother of his child, Sonny would owe her which may give her leverage if Carly spills to Sonny that his DNA is running through Kristina.  Those are the pitfalls she knows about.  Ric carries Alexisí fragile well-being in the breast pocket of his suits reveling in the fact that knowledge is power.  And Ric loves him a helpiní of power over Sonny.

Alexis has no dignity with Carly.

Sheís always begging for Carlyís silence. 

You can wash an old faded towel in Downy and love its new smell but itís still an old faded towel.  Sam was washed with a sympathetic fabric softener named Danny her mentally challenged older brother who sheís been supporting secretly for years, but sheís still the Sam who slept with Jax, then Sonny, then Jax, then Sonny with no shower in between.  Iím willing to appreciate the new fresh smelling Sam if she keeps the fabric softener called Danny.  Címon GH, donít offer two scenes with interesting Danny and then have Jason hide him away in the broom closet.  Step up to the plate and show us a story involving a mentally handicapped person, I dare you.  It has a lot more pull than one incident of erectile dysfunction in a teenager. 

Downy soft and fresh smelling?

Maybe. 

Smelliní good or not, my heart hurt for Sam when Sonny, as gently as he could, stated flat out that he was going to come clean with Carly about Samís baby in an attempt to salvage his marriage with no secrets between Carly and him.  It was hard to watch Samís private fantasies shatter along with her heart.

It was a regular cryfest among Sonnyís women this week. 

Raise your hand if you talked to your TV screen telling Georgie to shut up already!  I remember being an insecure teenager, but I donít remember being quite as self involved as Georgie.  Dillon tried and tried to explain his situation with his shrinky dinky and rejuvenated mojo but she couldnít grasp that it wasnít about her.  My parent side is glad that theyíre not having sex because teenagers having sex hits a little too close to home for me with my kids.  In fact, Iíd like Irish priest Dillon to come to my house and discuss the benefits if picnics and volleyball with my son as long as Lizard Lounge Dillon doesnít show up with him.

 

Dillonís fantasies certainly are filled with detail from the priestís collar to the

smarmy jacket. 

Dillonís one time embarrassing moment doesnít strike me as a life scarring problem that teens across the land can relate to.  However, Brook Lynn reacting badly when she spotted her mother talking and laughing with handsome Lorenzo, a man other than her father, could be a relatable issue.  I like that Brook Lynn consistently disses her mother but leaps to protect her when, for example, Granny Tracey calls her trailer park trash.  

Poor, poor unlucky Lucky.  No matter what door the guy knocks on he finds a girl in love with somebody else.  Now heís pining for Emily who canít see him for the shine on her lip gloss.  Lucky/Emily/Nik canít even be labeled a triangle.  His scenes are more of a canít-figure-out-what-to-do-with-this-hunk variety.  Now if Lucky took off his shirt every time he saw Emily and told her he loved her, I might be intrigued.  And for the record, he can break me out of the hospital anytime.

Can you hear the background music?

ďStop!  In the name of looooove.  Before you break my heart.

Think it o-oveerrrrr.Ē 

Nikolas is riding his donít-like-anybody steed with authority.  So far he doesnít like Emily, Mary, Lucky, Alexis, Helena and Jason and since thatís everyone he knows except Lorenzo, Iíd say heís successfully moving to the dark side of Cassadine.  Iím bummed that neither Mary nor Emily are showing signs of morning sickness because I was really looking forward to future Cassadine offspring.  Somebody has to make some babies or Sonnyís kids are going to take over Port Sibling-Rivalry StepChuck in a couple years. 

In a new twist GH tried dark comedy.  Heather fantasized about marrying widowed Edward and then poisoned him while still wearing her wedding dress.  She moved so quickly that SoapNet could use her fantasy on their One Minute Soap series and it really would be one minute.

I love you, youíre dead. 

Now that I think about it, comedy popped up a couple more times during the week.  Mike gave Jax the Daddy Glare when he delivered food to Courtneyís apartment and didnít back down until Jax made his excuses and left.  Right or wrong, Daddy Glares create a special bond between fathers and daughters.  Sometimes they create heated arguments too, but thatís a different issue.

It was a perfect touch-my-daughter-and-youíre-dead glare. 

How great was it that Monica and Alan shared a couple scenes that didnít involve propping up other characters.  Blue mojo pills notwithstanding, I enjoyed seeing two of the over 30 characters playing love-in-the-afternoon, love-on-a-gurney, and love-in-a-rose-garden.  ďCan we have a little privacy please?Ē

The doctors Quartermaine shake their groove thang. 

Let us not forget Faithís comeuppance when she, busy reveling in her power over Sonny because she knew Samís paternity secret, didnít notice Carlyís entrance into the penthouse.  As Faith uncharacteristically turned fearful and ran out of the penthouse as she realized that Carly knew the baby secret, I thought Carly should say, ďHop, hop, little bunny.Ē

  

From gloating, to gut twisting realization, to panic.

Not Faithís usual modus operandi.

Most people panic and turn pale.

Faith panics and wears white and her hair turns black. 

How come the deputy from South Carolina sent to escort Sam to her guilty fate looks like his name should be Bubba or Jim Bob.

An I got dis here badge dat says I kin take Ďer back

tí face Ďer punishment.

An I got a gun too. 

I wondered why I saw nuLucas in a couple scenes and then he disappeared but then I figured out.  Heís keeping a low profile afraid that if he speaks or appears in too many scenes, heíll be sent away again to diabetic camp or boarding school. 

If I couldnít laugh at spoilers, Iíd give Ďem up.  Not!  I love spoilers. 

Emily eavesdrops and hears Lorenzo telling Nikolas and Mary to sneak Faith out of the country on his Yacht. (GHFF)

Ahem.  Iím afraid that this unacceptable behavior for Emily.  After all, she has an important image to uphold as Lila-in-training.  This doesnít seem like appropriate Lila-esque behavior.

Nik is on drugs, courtesy of Helena.  Em gets herself locked up, and is drugged up, along with Nikolas.  Will Nikolas be able to save them both?  (GHH2)

Will Emily realize how ridiculous it was to voluntarily have herself committed?  Doesnít she know that straightjackets as a fashion statement are out this year?

Coleman gives Carly a helping hand.  (GHH2) 

Really?  Does it involve a pool table?

School supply ads held sway in this weekís Sunday paper and I realized that summer is winding down.  Itís flown by at breakneck speed.  Soon Iíll be rising in the middle of the night to cart sleepy kids to school.  My theory is that if itís still dark outside, itís night not morning.  And if the temperature rises over 80, itís still summer.  However, the school board never calls to ask me what I think, so they donít have the benefit of my assessments when they designate a date for the first day of school.  August 11th should be filled with cartoons, swimming, hide and seeks, and popsicles Ė not buses, backpacks and class schedules.  Trying for a positive spin, Iíll have peace and quiet during the day which I always appreciate but rarely experience.   

I hope your summer has been filled with adventure and good memories as mine has this year.  Soon the leaves will begin changing and temperatures will gradually wane, until jackets become necessary.  Autumn is my favorite season!  Donít forget to buy a new box of crayons for your kids and even if you donít have kids, spend the $.50 and buy a box anyway.  Thereís something pristine and hopeful about a brand new box of crayons that makes every picture in your head seem possible to draw and color.  May your colors be unique and vivid!  Thanks for stopping by. 

Iím taking a walk to clear my head.

Be back soon.

 

Yay!  For screen caps at GH World 5


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