Hello fellow cleaners! Have you been wondering where the Diva of Clean has been lately? I took a break. I had to. I got so many emails from the wonderful EOS readers offering to help me deal with my obsessive compulsiveness with regard to cleaning, I felt I had to step back. Though I appreciate all the concern and yup, even prayers, let me write this as clearly as possible…I AM NOT OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVE! I am a neat freak. And there’s not a thing wrong with that!
There, I feel much, much better. Thanks!
I’ve decided to make this column about Spring cleaning since it’s almost March and Spring is on it’s way. Or it was, here in Atlanta, anyway. We got hit with the “Snow Storm of 2004” as they’re now calling it on the news. School’s closed and the highways are a wreck, as are about 299 cars here in the metro Atlanta area. The grocery stores are running low if not already out of milk, eggs and bread here at 7 AM. I guess, when it snows in GA, everyone wants to make French toast. All this turmoil for a whopping INCH of snow. Yes, you read that right. ONE WHOPPING INCH OF SNOW for the Snow Storm of 2004. Unbelievable!
Therefore, I cannot start
my Spring cleaning today, but I can certainly write about it. Actually, to
fill ya’ll in on a little secret, I couldn’t have started the cleaning
today anyway. Or for about three weeks, for that matter. I had a tiny bit
of surgery on Tuesday that will keep me from lifting anything over my head
for three weeks. I’m a bit sore and all taped up, sleep hasn’t come easily
but I’m thankful for the pain killers the plastic surgeon has prescribed.
Yes, I finally succumbed to something I thought I’d never do. I got
implants! I stepped back, took a good long look at myself in the mirror,
tried the Samantha from Bewitched nose twitch and stated firmly,
“Pear shape, be gone!” but it didn’t work, so off for a few hundred CC’s
of saline and poof! I’m no longer a pear! Right now I resemble a new
mother engorged, all firm and high breasted and in a whole lot of pain! If
anyone thinks of coming near me to offer a hug or even a slight touch of
the breast I swear I will kill them right then and there.
The One Where She Introduces Herself
Cleaning Up the Clutter